For Him - Shawn Mendes

a flower FOR her

HANNAH

With my phone pressed against my shoulder and neck, I balanced two boxes of clothes to the van outside.

"You'll visit in the holidays, right?" Lily rushed, her tone now frantic. "Because, Lord, help me if I'm left without you for longer than two months, I'll actually cut a bitch."

"Not before apologising first," I mumbled back, the smirk on my face not visible through the phone, "you're too polite to cut a bitch. And I'll see, dad says that if the business fails we'll consider coming back."

Lily shuffled behind the phone, "Is it selfish for me to wish the worst for your parents' business?"

"No," I shrugged, placing the two boxes in the back of the van before taking the phone from my ear, "I mean, part of me hopes it flunks too. But Lil, you'll be completely fine without me, okay?"

She fell silent on the other line before a sob escaped her lips, "Han, I know I can't say goodbye properly because I'm trapped in this shitty excuse of a boarding school, but you need to give Nico a chance. He loves you, you know that."

And I knew it was coming. Oh, I knew. "You don't know Nico like I do," I replied, the harshness in my voice coming across stronger than I intended it to, "he's not... forgiving. I've left it too late, Lil. I can't." I watched as my older brother, Noah, passed me with boxes of his own. He flashed me an 'are you okay?' look, but I just nodded.

There was a long pause between us, interrupted only by the occasional sniff from Lily. "Please don't cry," I cooed, "Canada isn't that far away."

"Yes it is," Chloe, my younger sister deadpanned from beside me. I glared at her, sticking my tongue out playfully.

"See!" Lily protested, "It's all the way in Moose-land! God, Han, I might never see you again."

"Maybe that's for the best," Chloe sassed, before disappearing up the stairs to grab more boxes. I walked sheepishly into the kitchen.

"I'll come back," I promised her, "next summer maybe, don't you worr-"

I was interrupted by the sound of the front door squeaking open from behind me. I turned, only to be met by the deafening silence of Nico Evans, his arms widely outstretched with confusion as he stood, still, in the middle of my now empty living room. In his right hand was a pink rose. A single pink rose.

"I can explain," I rushed, an overwhelming wave of guilt crashing down on me as I hung up on Lil.

Nico hid the rose behind his back, a sour look plastered to his face. "Oh, I'd really like to see you try."

"Nico," I began.

He shook his head firmly. "Actually, no," He paused, breathing out before shaking his head again to stop the tears, "Hannah, no-one should have to hear that their best friend is moving to fucking Canada from the mailman."

"Nico," I repeated, his name rolling reluctantly off my tongue, "please just listen?"

"Is that why you kissed me?" He cut in, his fingers tracing over the rose still pressed against his hand, "Because you thought you'd never see me again?"

I pressed my lips together firmly, my eyebrows raised in softened apology.

"You're unbelievable," His jaw tightened, tongue pressed against his cheek, "Hannah Collins you're actually unbelievable."

"I'm sorry," I squeaked, "This," I said, signalling to the emptiness around us, "wasn't my choice and I should have told you, I know, I just-" and I couldn't finish my sentence because suddenly tears were welling in my eyes and I was realizing that I had no valid reason for not telling Nico, other than being completely and utterly overwhelmed by the situation. "I'm so sorry."

And I deserved to be punched by Nico, to be ignored and forgotten for what I'd done but instead, the boy wrapped his arms slowly around me, his head falling heavily on my shoulder. The anger was still present in his tight embrace, but it was softened by his calm nature. "Canada, eh?" He choked, a fake Canadian accent plastered over his strong Australian one.

"Sorry," I mumbled, my head still firmly pressed to the crook of his neck. "Sorry, sorry, sorry, sor-"

He stopped me, his finger pressed delicately to my lips as he pulled away from the hug. He took the rose from behind my back, holding it in his left hand weakly. "Fuck, to think I was going to ask you out."

I opened my mouth to reply, but the words caught themselves on my tongue, never passing my lips. He took my hand from the side of my body to where he was holding the rose, where he placed it slowly in my palm.

"Does Chloe still have that silly flower press? The pink thing that sucks the water from the petals to preserve them?"

I nodded, still unable to memorise the complexities of the English language.

"Good," He nodded, pulling me into another tight hug. "Keep that shit."

And letter by letter the alphabet found it's way into my tongue again, the sudden need to say everything yet nothing consuming me. I wanted to tell Nico that I'd liked him, I'd wanted to tell him that the flower was the prettiest thing anyone had ever given me- I wanted to tell him I'd miss him. But instead, I hugged him tighter, the words "I will," escaping from my clouded head into his.

- A/N -

Their ship name would be... Nanna (I choked).

But ahhh chapter two of the new and (somewhat) improved Believe in Me.

Honest thoughts? x

- N -