24. A Big Decision [Alyssae]

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When the dwarfs told her about the atmosphere ruling Erebor and the unknown dwarf who only whispered malevolent words to Thorin, Alyssae took a hard decision. She didn't want to wait any longer. She wanted to do something. In her head a plan formed, although there was one thing in her way. Her enormous belly. 

She didn't even need to talk about it with the dwarfs. Only by their appearance they had called up the longing to go into the woods again to enjoy life - or at least to try it. She couldn't do so here, within the four walls of her home.  She sent out the maids to get a healer and requested the two dwarfs to leave her house as well. She didn't want anyone near when her lifeless child would be helped into this world. The thought hurt, but it was a necessity. Nobody became happier when she carried around a dead child. And if it did live... Alyssae did not know what that would mean. Then she would have to wait to travel to Erebor and she suspected the things would only become more complicated. But that was something to worry about later. 

. . .

"Are you sure?" Ulmèra had taken place on the edge of the bed. "You had such a strong opinion."

"I understand there will be no natural birth."

Ulmèra nodded. "I - eh - I think we both know that -"

"Just do it," Alyssae interrupted her. Despite her determination the tears stung in her eyes. A part of Thorin had lived four years within her and now she would end it. She did not know whether she had to consider it as a liberation or a lack and she felt relieved when the elf told her she could drink something which would turn down her mind, so that she would feel no pain. The elf gave her a brew, which she drank in silence. Then she closed her eyes and was sagged in a strange, colorful world in which she sauntered around pointless, without being able to see herself when she looked down. It felt like her spirit floated over the fields and waters. As if she was dead. 

. . .

The first thing that penetrated her mind, was an icy scream. At first she thought it belonged to the drowsing dream world she had entered, but the noise became harder and harder and in the end she opened her eyes. She touched for her belly, but her child was gone. There was still a cut in her  skin and it pounded. Her eyes flashed through the room. Ulmère stood against the door. With eyes grown by repulsion she stared at the ground. 

Softly moaning Alyssae came upright.

"She bit me!" Ulmère didn't take away her eyes from the ground. "That monster bit me!"

After hearing those words, Alyssae was overwhelmed by both anger and joy. She had a daughter. But nobody called her newborn child a monster!

"What's going on?" Her voice sounded stronger than she felt. 

"Look for yourself." The woman didn't take away her glance, as if she was afraid that something would tore her in pieces. 

With effort Alyssae leaned forward. Her mouth dropped open when she saw the creature, which had absolute not the seize of a baby. 

She sat on the ground, had a pale skin and when she looked up to see her mother, a shiver crept down her spine. She had no irises. They were just as white as the rest of her eye, and that was not the only thing that took her breath away. She had white, bat-like wings that softly clacked in an invisible wind. 

"This creature is wicked," sounded the condemnatory voice of Ulmèra. She looked Alyssae right in the eye and rage flared up again when she understood the look in her eyes. 

"If you show your discontent about my daughter once more, you will be expelled from this society."

The elf said nothing, turned around and left the house, leaving Alyssae  on her bed. She felt weak. The wound in her belly was not stitched and with a tired face she stretched her arm to the strange girl who watched her with intelligent eyes. She tilted her head for a moment, but then lost her interest and watched the room.

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