I feel like I'm having an existential crisis. Maybe even a mid-life crisis, which is impossible seeing as I'm only 17. My life is good. Nothing super bad ever really happens to me, not physically at least. Mentally, my life is a whirl pool of everything. If someone where to cut open my head and look inside, all they'd see is a black void of chaos.
"Elena! Are you ready yet?" I hear my mom scream from downstairs, snapping me out of my thoughts.
"Yeah Mom! I'm coming!" I yell back. I tie my red flannel around my waist (pic) and slip into my black converse. I grab my phone and run downstairs to greet my mom.
"Alright, let's get going." She smiles brightly.
We were going to meet up for a camp I will be going to the following day. The camp was great, it was in the summer for 2 whole months. Where we were going at the moment is like a pre-camp situation, a chance to meet fellow campers and to meet the staff. It was at a park on the beach, and across the street was the ocean. I absolutely love living in California.
We pull up and park next to the street, there are lots of people already here. My dad and my 8 year old sister, Layla, were waving us over to a picnic bench. They were getting ice cream earlier and decided to meet us here.
Next to the playground was a whole table of food and drinks. We sit on the bench, catching up on each other's days.
"So Layla, how was the ice cream?", my mom asks.
"Yummy!" She smiles and giggles a bit.
Then my mom and dad start talking about work stuff, so I don't pay attention. I sit up, starting to look around at all of the people that I will have to spend time with for the next 2 months. Then I saw a tall boy, Oliver, talking to a group of people. I sit back down immediately and started to feel my checks burn red.
Oliver was a boy who I only had one class with, Spanish. He sat in the back of the class and didn't really talk much. You would think that because of his appearance and attitude that he wouldn't necessarily be smart. But believe me, I've seen his test scores, he's amazing. Not just at Spanish, but in every other subject as well. In his Calc class he has an A+ when I'm passing with a C+.
He's the mysterious type of boy. He would read quite a lot but really kept to himself, and almost always wear a plain black T-shirt. He's smart and thoughtful. When it won a school reward, I had a chance to read his essay for English about the Civil Rights Movement, and it was just incredible. His thoughtfulness was easy to see.
He was also, surprisingly, quite athletic. Even though he never participated in sports, a couple of times I've seen him lifting weights in the school gym.
He had this persona of caring about everything, yet not caring about anything at all. Just by having a single class with him, I've been able to tell how complicated he is, and I've only spoken to him twice.
I whispered to my mom, "Mom you know how I kind of like Oliver?"
(I basically tell my mom everything. Oops.)
"Yeah, why?" she asks.
"Well..." I pointed slightly, "He's here."
My mom turns around to look, then looks back at me, giving me a wide smile.
I just stare at my empty plate, praying that he doesn't come over here.
Well, that didn't work, because he came strolling over to us. There he was, my crush, standing in front of my table. He looks at all of us before speaking, but looks at me directly while he talks. I could feel his eyes burning into me, but I just kept staring at my empty plate.
