HephaestusTV.com (Companion to HephaestusTV and a Percy Jackson Fanfiction)

Season 2 Episodes 6-7 - Bonus Wilderness Scenes

Leo: *Carefully picks up a ladybug with his finger* Aw, look at it! It's so cute. *Softly pets ladybug with other finger* I'm gonna name him Gary. Who's a good ladybug? That's right, you are!

Gary the Ladybug: *Flies away*

Leo:*Overdramatically* GARY NO! DON'T LEAVE ME!
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*Something rustles from inside a bush*

Percy: *Pulls out his sword* Stand back. I sense a monster.

Chloe: *Rolls eyes* *Sticks her arm inside the bush* (NOTE: Don't do anything Chloe does because she's stupid.)

Percy: Are you trying to get yourself killed???

Chloe: *Pulls out a baby rabbit*
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Zach: *Unaware of camera* *Singing quietly* In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the monsters sleep tonigh-CHLOE YOU JERK! *Covers camera with hand*
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Zach: *Sniffs armpit* Gross, I smell like Leo.

Leo: *Sniffs armpit* I smell like Percy.

Percy: *Sniffs armpit* I smell like two Percys.
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Calypso: Zachary, you're camera is at 10% battery.

Zach: That's 'cause you people keep videotaping random squirrels! And don't use my full name; it makes feel like a kid who's about to get grounded.
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Chloe: *Holds the camera*

Calypso: *To the camera* It's midnight and the boys are asleep because the two of us said we'd take the first watch.

Chloe: *Sympathetic* I feel bad for leaving Zach there. I know how much he hates being alone in the dark.

Calypso: Remember Girl Code #1; Baths before Boys.

Chloe: Tell the audience where we're going.

Calypso: Yesterday afternoon, I was looking for food when I stumbled across a (slightly warm) running stream inside a mountain and Chloe and I are going to take a shower there. Don't tell the boys.

Chloe: Okay, before you get dirty thoughts just know that we're showing you the location in case you ever get stuck in the middle of nowhere while trying to film a TV show. And we're here! *Pans camera around* Take a good look because I'm turning this thing off...now.
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Percy: *Zooms camera in on a very fat squirrel*
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Leo: *Pans camera up and down a tree trunk* And here we have the acient tree of wonder! Legend has it that at this spot the mighty son of Hephaestus was utterly humiliated by a scrawny backstage laborer for the reclaiming of a modern technological demigod artifact. Who knows what could've been accomplished if the hero wasn't betrayed by his lowlife "friends".

Zach: Who took my camera???

Chloe, Percy, and Calypso: *Points at Leo*
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Chloe: *Listening to music on her phone*

Leo: You have Spotify Premium?

Chloe: Obviously not. I don't have that kind of money.

Leo: You're one of the richest demigods in the entertainment industry.

Chloe: I'm boycotting corporate interests.

Leo: Okay...so how'd you get free music offline?

Chloe: I'm a child of Hermes.
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Percy: *Holds out camera like a vlogger* *Silently draws a Hitler mustache on Leo's face*
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Leo: *Zooms in on an obese squirrel*
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Percy: I made a friend! *Holds up a dead fish* Oh...oops.
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Calypso: Tonight we're playing a game called "Spin the Bottle" with Zachary's water bottle. I'm not sure why, but this is a popular game in this century. Fun fact: it used to be "Spin the Ming Vase" where two people had to go in combat rather than kiss.

Zach: I'll go first. *Spins the bottle*

Calypso, Leo, and Percy: *Jumps out of the circle*

Chloe: You jerks!
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Chloe: On this episode of Demigods vs. Wild I'll be showing you the proper way to start a fire. First, you need some dry wood. *Points to a stack of wood* Next, you need a Valdez. *Drags Leo by his arm*
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Percy: *Sucks on a pebble*

Leo: *Bites a stick*

Zach: *Tries to fill himself with water*

Calypso: *Eats freshly harvested wild berries*

Chloe: *Goes hunting*

Athena's narrating voice: There are five types of people...
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Zach: *Sobbing over a book* Why Newt, why?

Leo: *Sarcastic* Ladies and gentlemen, Gallagher's future boyfriend.

Zach: IT'S NOT FUNNY!

Leo: *Hand puppet* It's not funny!

Zach: STOP MOCKING MY PAIN!
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Percy, Leo, Zach, and Calypso: *Roasts food over a campfire*

Chloe: *Adds wood to the fire*

Calypso: Am I allowed to film sentimental material on this camera?

Percy: *Mouth full of food* If you want.

Calypso: Good. I just wanted to say that I think the five of us have grown closer over this experience and I like that-

~ Battery dies ~
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I'm compiling a HephaestusTV Frequently Asked Questions list so if you could take a few seconds to ask about the studio and the show itself that would be amazing. (It's an FAQ, not a Q&A, so they're not about the characters.)

~ C. Gallagher