Not Easily Forgotten (TheCampingRusher X Reader Fanfic)

Chapter 16: Is This Goodbye?

((TRIGGER WARNING PLEASE DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO SUICIDE))

(YouTube name) has just uploaded: I'm Guessing This Is Goodbye. : five minutes ago

Huh? S-She uploaded a video?! I place my hand on the mouse and quickly click on the notification and the video pops up.

My phone vibrates in my back pocket, I take it out and look at the notification.
(YouTube name) has just uploaded: I'm Guessing This Is Goodbye. : five minutes ago
Curiosity took over me and I click on the video.

Twenty certain other people had also gotten the notification and had opened the new video that (y/n) had uploaded, not to long ago.

~~~~

I pull up my white chair and sat down in front of the recording camera. Nervously, I messed with the bottom of my black shirt. Then, slowly, I waved to the audience. My eyes were a little pink with gray bags underneath.

"Hey... Um, I just wanted to make a small video about why I haven't been posting. Just in case, you do not know. Fuck, what am I talking about? Of course y'all would know." I shook my head, clearing my thoughts. "I don't want to start any drama, I just thought that you all deserved to know." I take a deep shaky breath before continuing. "Rusher... Had um been cheating on me." I had quietly mumbled out, "I guess that had caused me to go into a deep depression..." I felt a warm wet substance go down my cheek. I quickly wiped it off, not wanting my subscribers to see my weak side. I looked up to the camera a forced a smile, that slowly turned into a frown again. "I've been feeling the stabbing pain in my heart for the past... Hell I don't know.... But I do know that I can not take it anymore." I looked down, to the metal object laying next to the chair I was sitting in. "The pain, the suffering, knowing that he never cared, knowing that he was using me. I can not take it. Maybe some of you can, maybe you've been in this situation before... The thing is, I'm not that strong... My family isn't here to help, to support me. And when my friends did try to help, I felt like I was waisting their time. I feel like... Like I'm a waste of space ." I looked straight at the camera, with determined filled eyes. "I'm going to fix all of that soon, I'll make everything better." The object was now laying in my lap with my hands clutching it. One bullet. One try. "But for now, this is goodbye. Im sorry Bayani, Tofuu, Mitch.... Even rusher. I'm sorry, Braden, but you can live a better life with your new girlfriend, I'm sorry for being in the way." I ended the video with a small smile with tears threating to escape my (e/c) orbs.

I don't know how long I've spent sitting in that chair with the metal on my temple, but the only thing that broke me from my dark thoughts, was a simple argent knock on the door. Since I was sitting in the living room, I could hear it clearly.

"(Y/n)??!!? Open this door!" The knocking had soon tured into banging when I didn't answer.

I was just quietly sitting in the chair staring at the front door.

Who's voice is that? It sounds so familar, yet I cannot seem to put my finger on it.

The voice that was behind the wooden door become soft and quiet. I heard a small sniff.

"Please, (y/n)... Open this door, I can't be too late... I..." There was a hiccup.

I slowly stood up and walked to the door, I was about to touch the silver doorhandle, to open the door. When I heard a loud footsteps coming closer and another familiar voice but instead of being quiet he was very loud and upset.

"Has she answered??!!" Right after he had asked, I guess the other person had answered too quietly for me to hear because before I know it there was loud banging on the door. "(Y/n)! Can you hear me? Open this door! I'm going to bust it down!"

There was a moment of silence.

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BANG!

The voice that was quiet before spoke...

"(Y/N)!!"

I fell to my knees with a loud thud. I remember that voice now, the one who changed my life, the one who had made it better, had made it worth living. I will never forget that voice, the voice that belongs to, the one and only,

TheCampingRusher.

The door had been kicked open and the two figures ran in and fell to my side.