Let Me Go [Sequel to Lost, Hopeless, and Destroyed]

Chapter 11

*Liam's POV*

GOD, why am I feeling this way towards her?

"It's all about emotion Liam. You still possess all of your human like abilities. Besides some things, but the emotions and feelings are basically the same." GOD told me.

"Oh. I just don't want to fall for someone I can't have. But I guess it's too late... ugh I didn't sign up for this!"

"Yeah but you did sign up to end your life. So it's either this, or Hell. Do you want that Liam?" GOD asks me.

"N-No sir."

"Exactly, Liam."

"I just want her to be happy." I say.

"I know Liam, I know. And you have been helping her for two years now. You're doing really well. I'm proud."

"Thank you."

*Autumn's POV*

I woke up to find Liam gone. This didn't shock me. It was what usually happened. It's like a one night stand haha. But seriously, he's a ghost/spirit or whatever. It's not uncommon even though I have no clue really because this is not normal I assume. Right?

I'm bored through out the day, and then finally night comes. I decided to start getting ready for the fair. That is until Zach suddenly calls me. He's told me that he's on his way in 15 minutes. I sigh and try to get ready quick. I skip dinner knowing we're going to eat there. I finish getting ready right in time. I here Zach honk his horn in his car outside. I say goodbye to my parents, and leave out the door.

I get in the car and we start talking about a couple of things from yesterday. I told him I was fine now. I was, but there was still something that was making me a little upset. But I wasn't going to tell him that.

We arrive at the fair/carnival. The view is beautiful. I'm interupted by my thoughts when Zach says something to me.

"Hey, did you eat yet?"

My eyes go wide for a second, but then they die down again.

"Uhh, no."

"Autumn.." He looks at me in a certain way.

"What? I wanted to make room for all the greasy food we're gonna have today." I smile.

"Yeah... I can vouch for that!" He chuckles.

-------

"AHH!" I squeel. We were riding the farris wheel. We reached the top and of course it stopped. I hold on to Zach for dear life. He laughs. And for the first time. I see someone in the cart ahead of us. The back of they're head reminds me of someone... Liam. It is dark though. But I know what I'm seeing.

"Liam" I whisper. The person turns around and it is him. It's Liam.

"What was that Auts?" Zach asks me, hearing that I whispered something.

"Oh, nothing." I'm still stairing at Liam's figure. He looks... hurt or jealous.

Aww... was this because I was with Zach? I have no clue. But even though I do feel like I'm in love with Liam, and he doesn't even know. He has to accept the fact that he's not alive. So it's impossible to have a relationship with him. Plus it would be too weird.

I try to get it out of my mind that Liam is on the same farris wheel as us. I try to ignore it and after awhile I decide to look and now he's gone. What the fuck?

My life is getting more weird and weird by the second. Why is this happening to me? Ugh, whatever. I'm not gonna let it ruin my day or make me wonder why my life is so crazy and confusing.

After the ride was over, we choose to go on the carousel, or as other people call it, the marry go round. We give the person our ticket and walk on it. We both get a horse. I choose the one on the outside. I love those ones. He picked the inside. Obviously because he wanted to have the one beside mine.

The ride started and the music started playing. It reminded me of when I was a little kid. I've always used to love these things. I still do, it's just different now that I'm older.

The ride starts and the horses are going up and down in a swiftly motion as the ride spins us around. The wind blowing in my face was amazing. I laughed at how much fun it was. Forgetting how much I loved it back when I was a kid. But now I remember.

Zach grabs my hand, and we hold eachother's hand for the last minute or so left of the ride. It finally comes to a stop and we get off.

"That was great Zachy." I side hug him as we start walking.

"I'm glad you liked it." He smiled, bringing me into a side hug. Holding onto each other for dear life. But we just show each other our love that way. We do have a strong bond after all.

He hears my stomach growl. He looks at me. "Someone's hungry." He jokes. I don't say anything.

We walk over the this food stand. My stomach turns. Not because I don't want any, I do. It's just, a lot of grease for me to still handle. I haven't had this much of this kind of food for a long time, probably  since last year.

Zach orders Fries, cheese curds, pizza, mini donuts, and lastly, he pre orders the ice cream for after. I never dreamed of eating this much food and not purging right after.

I've had those dreams a lot in the time of my recovery. Eating so much and then puking my guts out.In my dreams it felt so good. But I knew I couldn't in real life. It would ruin everything. So I just live that life in my dreams. At least it's something, and their not real so... it works out.

We started eating and I ate a cheese curd first. The grease was so delious yet repulsing at the same time as it filled my mouth. The cheese was good though. I had about 3 of those and then I had a couple fries, a slice of pizza and then 2 mini dounuts. Then we went and got our ice cream cones and ate those.

I was uncomfortably full. Why did I eat so much?! ERG! Well, I didn't eat that much, but I got full easily because my stomach is still sorta small. So I get full fast.

I must have not been paying attention to how much or how little I was eating. I must have got lost in Zach's eyes. But when we were done, Zach had a huge smile on his face. I don't think I've ever seen him more happy, besides that time we first kissed.

I smile back so he can enjoy this moment of happiness that is coming off right now. I don't want anything to ruin this moment, or night for that matter.

But I had spoken too soon.

And before I knew it, I was getting this feeling in my stomach. It was coming up.

I was going to throw up...