Tainted | Kuroshitsuji ✔️

Chapter 41: Goodbye

She couldn't fall asleep no matter what she did. Earlier, she had ventured out of her room and to the balcony, hoping her little trip would help sleep come easier to her. Little did she know, her trip there gave her an unexpected encounter with Ciel Phantomhive that made her feel more awake than ever. She had tried counting sheeps but lost count eventually. After that, she tried to tire herself by doing push-ups, unfortunately it only earned her sore arms.

Nothing worked. None could quiet her flustered mind. In the end, she just flopped down on her bed with a frustrated sigh.

Estella laid on her bed, staring intensely at the ceiling as she lifted her fingers up to her lips once more. She could still feel them tingling from the kiss Ciel and her shared. It felt surreal. Was it just her imagination making fun of her? She just couldn't bring herself to believe it but the tingle that made her lips tremble was always there to remind her that it was indeed real.

Everytime her mind wandered back to play with that memory, heat would erupt in her like fire and spread across her cheeks, colouring them red.

She never knew nor did it ever come across her mind that she would ever be kissed by Ciel Phantomhive. The way his lips had moved with hers made her feel like a fragile doll that would break if he did otherwise. The gentleness she didn't know the seemingly cold, serious Earl was capable of had taken her by surprise.

The moment they shared was wonderful, frustrating and confusing.

What did that all mean? What were they now? And how was she going to act around the boy now? Act like it didn't happen? Estella rolled to her side with a heavy sigh. How was he going to act around her? What about Elizabeth?

Like her question was synched with her memory, the words she heard from the day rang in her head.

"Your master is betrothed to my daughter. Do you think I'm going to let someone incompetent guard my son-in-law and risk the future of the Phantomhives?"

Cringing inwardly at the pang of guilt that struck her hard like a hammer, her eyebrows furrowed deeply as she thought of a certain cheerful and good-natured young Midford. Guilt grew tenfold along with shame when her mind played the image of Ciel's and Elizabeth's linked arms.

Her hands curled up into shaking fists and the sides of her mouth turned down.

She suddenly felt despicable.

....

"The guests would be arriving soon." Estella craned her head to look at Sebastian whose gaze was on his pocket watch. "Is the Young Master's tea ready?"

"Almost." She turned back to the unfinished tea with a nod.

"Excellent." The butler snapped the watch in his hand close. "Serve it quick before the guest arrive." He strode out of the kitchen without another word.

Yawning tiredly, Estella glanced down at her work with a sigh and moved to finish it. Her face hardened with a determined look as she placed the tea set on the silver platter, her thoughts set on the decision she had spent the almost whole night thinking about.

She had to tell him. She knew it was the only way to steer them back to their rightful relationship.

Eyebrows set in a furrow, Estella lifted the platter off the counter and strolled out of the kitchen, heart racing.

....

Focusing on the paperwork on the desk proved to be difficult for Ciel Phantomhive this morning. Each time he tried to read the details on the papers, he would find himself thinking about last night instead, and a smile on his lips when he did. He felt foolish everytime he realized he was doing that.