Just Like Old Times...

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Leah.

"Are you sure you'll be okay?" I asked Ty once more.

"Yeah I'll be good. I just need a few days. We can still keep in touch though." His head hung over his untouched plate.

We were in the basement of Ty's mother's church home and we were eating dinner. It's been a few days since I found out about her passing and today was the funeral. Ty was doing better but he was still terrible. It would take him a while to get over this. I knew how much he love, love, loved his mother. Especially growing up without a father. All his love went to her and never fell short, even when they fought.

"Well I don't want to leave just yet but I have to go to the restroom." I stood from my fold-up chair. I had to pee a lot more frequently nowadays. I glanced at Ty and his food. "Try to eat for me okay?" I rubbed his back and he barely nodded. I sighed and made my way to the bathroom.

I'd been getting stares all day from Ty's family. They don't know what to think about me but some of them don't even know who I am so they don't have the place to think anything.

I did my business and started making my way back to the activity center when I was stopped by one of Ty's aunts.

"Hey baby. How ya doin'?" Her raspy voice gave away her age even though her skin was flawless and her body was tight. Eh, black don't crack.

"I'm just fine Auntie..." I took a wild guess at her name. "Cheryl." She was still smiling. "Thanks for asking."

"So does Ty know?" She smiled from ear to ear.

"Know what?" I furrowed my eyebrows.

"You know, about the..." She winked at me and then my stomach. Was she crazy?

"Of course he knows." I chuckled in awe. Maybe she was taking the passing a bit hard.

"Well, yeah. But I mean, he's not alert right now. His mother just died. He's out of his element. He doesn't know anything that's going on right now. He definitely doesn't know you're pregnant ." She wasn't smiling anymore. She wasn't mad but her expression seemed concerned. Psh. Concerned about my affairs? She can go somewhere with that.

"You know what? I don't have ti-" I brushed past her & began walking away.

"Is it his?" She stopped me dead in my tracks.

"What?" I was still facing opposite of her.

"Is the baby his?" She questioned. I turned on my heels and started walking back towards her.

"Why would you ask me th-"

"You don't know do you?" Now she seemed mad. I gulped fiercely. There was a lump in my throat. Something bad was about to happen. I didn't say yes or no. "Well whether you do or not, everyone in there is blaming you. For everything. For keeping Ty away from his mother for so long, for being the reason he left, even for Dana."

"Now hold on just a second. Dana was not a mistake or a punishment or act of wrongdoing. She is a smart, beautiful child that I've grown to love over the past few weeks." I confidently spoke. The lump got larger though.

"Is that why you got pregnant? You were jealous?" She looked at me coldly, dead in the eye. She wasn't making any sense. I charged into the activity center  and cleared my throat.

"Okay everyone listen up!" I yelled and everyone slowly silenced. "Yes! I am pregnant." I pointed towards my belly. "No, I don't know who the father is." I accidentally made eye contact with Ty. His eyes softened and I looked down. A tear fell. "Yes. I have wasted the past few years of my life and been a failure dependent on others. Those weren't my intentions but life isn't planned. It shouldn't be anyways. What matters now is that my child is on the way. He or she is healthy, he or she will have a caring mother, and he or she won't be what I have been. For those of you that are blaming me for everything, fine. You're entitled to your opinion. But realize, other than her grandmother, I am the first mother figure that little girl has ever had." Another tear as I looked over at Dana who was sitting on a woman's lap playing in her hair. "As for Ma, I loved her like I love my own mother. She helped to raise me. I would never intentionally drive her away from her son. Now, Ty." I looked him dead in the eye this time and shed a few years. "I've been loving this man for almost 15 years now. And I've been in love with him for a little less than half of those. He's been my best friend, big brother, shoulder to cry on, and guardian angel for a long time. So I would never want to hurt him either." I wiped my face. "Well, I hate to make this about me when we are celebrating Ma's homegoing. But for all of you that had something to say or were thinking things, now you can think and talk about that. The truth." I sniffed and waddled out as I glared at Auntie Cheryl. I sat on the steps of the church and wiped my tears. The baby was kicking awfully hard and I was lucky to be sitting. I heard the door open behind me and assumed it was Cheryl trying to check me.

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