Just Some Game (Larry Stylinson)

4.

Warning. It's possible but hard to tell js.

Ten days later
December 23rd

Winter brake happened to fall out the day after mine and Louis all day conversation. I always loved winter brake, spending time with my family while Gems came home. I even enjoyed Robin's company. Just this winter brake, I dreaded coming home after dropping Louis off.

The day after brake started, I vomited a lot more then I would originally. So today. I told mom after it happened again.

except-

I let sleep take over til I was fully satisfied, at least I thought I was satisfied but the second I woke up; I was vomiting in the palms of my hands while attempting to sit up so I didn't choke. The vomit kept coming. I was bound to run out of stomach fluids at this rate.

I attempted to walk to the bathroom to clean myself up but my legs fell weak, so I crawled. I crawled to the tub and sunk into the bottom as I reached for the shower handle. I turned it on and lied on the floor.

Water from the shower pelted against my body send cold vibrations over me. I turned the water handle to hot with my feet because I was to weak to attempt to sit up. I could barely use my arms to lift me up.

The vomiting always took a toll on my mood, and the way it happened today made me feel useless. I felt useless, drained, empty, and just flat out sad.

My arms felt to heavy to lift. My chest ached, and I felt my heart flop making it harder to move. I felt paralyzed. My breathing is uneven and the steamy air from the shower didn't help

I reached over and grabbed the shampoo and squirted it in my hair in to wash out any vomit that my have made it there. After I had finished washing my hair. I went in for the AXE to wash my body.

I coated my hands in soap and rubbed it all over my arms. I ran my hands over my shoulders, behind my neck, and over my face. The second I realized I'd have to run my hands over uncharted areas, I broke.

I sat up while my body shook as I cried. I'm crying, how pathetic? Something over the voice inside my head said, you cross your boundaries right now. I did it.

I ran my hands over my chest and stomach. As I went to run my hands over my stomach; I had expected it to go up and over. It didn't. I tested it again.

I placed my hand where expected fat to be. But there wasn't. I could feel my ribs- my ribs? Again. I tapped the ribs I felt. They were real, and there was no fat.

Again, I went further down over my stomach. My stomach wasn't lumped like I see in the mirror. In fact, it was caved. My stomach was damn near gone.

I had looked down to see with my own two eyes. Nope, see your a fat as-. I shook the voice out and glared at my stomach. Your eyes deceive you Harry. I brought myself to make a visionary image with my hands.

I traced my ribs. I traced the belly button I haven't looked at in years. I traced everything there.

Look again.

So I did, I looked down again. I ended up slipping over the wall of the tub spilling bubbles everywhere yelling for my mom, yet I didn't get mom. I never got my mother. Instead, I got Robin. Agh.

"Boy, what is-" I wasn't going to have it this time. I could tell by the look on his face he was going to tell me to man up and get off the floor- not having it.

"No, I want mom." I stated blunt and straightforward. I slid up against the tub and everything seemed to fall apart after that.

My body began sting as if I were being hit. Marks, and bright red ones at that, showed up all over my chest and arms. So, when mom came in the bathroom.

It had all looked wrong in so many ways. I was nearly weezing while tears fell. My back up against the tub with red marks all over my body while Robin stood over me. I tried so hard to get a calm to tell mom, it wasn't what it had looked like, but I felt like I was going to pass out.

"Ma." I went to speak but ended up sounding like an old frog croaking it's last croak. "Oh my poor baby- Robin get out." As he did as told, I found a pitch in my voice and used whatever I could get my hands on.

I told her everything. I told her it wasn't Robins fault and that he didn't do anything. I told her about my dream in 7th grade about Louis to the recent conversation. I told her how I saw fat in the mirror but my hands told me otherwise. I told her I made fun of Louis again in the 8th grade. I told her about vomiting and these bruises, how they randomly popped up.

Mom told me to stand so she could see. She wanted to see what she could do to help. I cupped my groin and stood up. Thats when I felt it.

That's when I felt something I haven't felt in a long time. I genuinely felt relieved, free, weight less, and brave.

"I've never shaved my legs momma, or even touch your razors." My voice wasn't weak anymore, in fact it was blank and held no emotion. I attempted to help her understand.

I could feel the syrup like liquid run down my legs. More sharp pain filled my thighs. Mom watched it. She watched as the skin incaved, opened up and ran across my leg. Just like that,my leg was bleeding more.

My obnoxious hiccuping stopped. Then next thing I knew I was out on the bathroom floor.

"Louis!? Sweetie, where you at?"

"I'm in the tub mah!"

I wrapped myself up in attempt to clean some of the blood off my thighs. It didn't work very well. I ended up turning on the shower and jumping in only to send a burning sensation to vibrate through my thighs.

I felt better. I felt weight less. Weight less like paper, cause paper could be cut and so could I.

But little did I know a paper with holes fell faster then a full sheet.

* * * *
a/n: It's been 5 months since I've last edited this chapter.... I'm not sure what I just read.