Love, Drugs, and High School

Chapter Sixteen

          “Are you going to tell me where we are going?” Annabelle piped up after being silent because I refused to talk to her.

          Silence.

          According to the map that I had looked at earlier today, we were close. It was now or never to tell her.

          “We are going to see my father,” was my short answer. We were almost there.

          The look on her face showed that she clearly didn’t understand, but I didn’t blame her. I hadn’t told her anything about my past, nor did I want to.

          Thankfully she didn’t question it. She just sat there next to me, resting her hand on my knee. Silently, I thanked her. Just her presence was calming me down more than she could ever know.

          “This is the house,” I said, parking the car on the side of the road. What was I going to say? Was this even a good idea?

          “Hey,” Annabelle said as we got out of the car. “I’m here for you. I’m not going anywhere. Just remember that.” She looked into my eyes and squeezed my hand gently.

          “He left me.” I said quietly, sitting down on the curb. “He left my mother and me. He left me alone to deal with her. All these years I hoped that he would come back for me….” My voice faded out. I couldn’t believe that I was telling her this. I could feel her gaze on me, so I continued, “I don’t know why I’m doing this. Closure maybe? I don’t really know. But I don’t blame him for leaving. I just wished that he would have taken me with him.”

          Annabelle’s expression was sorrowful, but she didn’t offer an apology or give him that look of pity, which was something that he had expected her to do. “Are you ready?” was all that she asked.

          I nodded my head slowly, but I was sure that I wanted to do this. “You didn’t deserve that,” Annabelle said quietly and left it at that.

          Trying to steady my shaking hand, I pushed the doorbell. As we waited, it was the first time that I actually looked at his house. It was small, enough for my father and his girlfriend—or wife—if he had one.

          I hadn’t even thought about that aspect of it. What if he had completely moved on from my mom and me? If he had a wife and kids…I would just be a nuisance to his new perfect little life.

          Annabelle must have seen that something was going wrong in my mind because she grabbed my hand right as I was about to walk off of the porch.

          “It’s ok,” she whispered quietly. We both heard the sound of footsteps coming towards the door. “You want to do this. And even if you don’t, you need to.”

          “Hello—oh.” A tall man stood in the doorframe. Judging by his face, he recognized me. We both just stood there for a minute, looking at each other. I wasn’t sure how to react; how I felt. “Ryan?” he asked and I knew right then that I really had missed him whether or not I wanted to admit it.