Teach Me(Student/Teacher)

Chapter 14 - Snap Shot

It's not that I don't LOVE that my best friend is dating my best friend, I think it's great! And stupid, but they're happy so that's good. After the initial excitement of Clary and Kirkos' first dating days I began to think and honestly, I am happy for them (if not a little jealous) and I'm glad that they're happy too. But somewhere deep down in the selfish part of my heart, I had doubts about them getting into a relationship. Which only makes me feel more like a hypocrite considering my own relations.

Now I've always prided myself for being a logical girl, even as a sixteen year old whom is not quite seventeen, I've always seen myself as one ahead of the herd. And as a logical sixteen year old I know that Clary and Kirkos' relationship isn't going to last, it's not very often that high school relationships last until marriage and even then, well there's a reason for the high divorce rates, and I doubt it's from the people who don't feel like they threw away their twenty's (their best years) for the one person they met in high school or regret that they've only ever been with one person and feel like they missed out on experiences of multiple lovers.

The thing is Kirkos is a great guy, and I love Clary, the only thing that would keep them together after their split would be an agreement to be friends, and even then it would be awkward especially if one of them tried to date again. Or what if the break up was bad? Then I would have to choose between Clary and Kirkos, and that would mean choosing between Clary and Gavriel, because obviously Gavriel would side with his brother. That means I would for sure lose Gavi and Kirkos as friends one way or another, and that just adds more stress to the worry pile I already had when thinking about how we would all remain friends after high school. And why should my friendships suffer because Clary and Kirkos couldn't keep it in their pants long enough to grow up?

Sighing I look over at Clary, napping soundly in the afternoon light. It's not my place to judge whether she should be in a relationship or not, if she likes someone who am I to tell her she shouldn't date, she's old enough to make her own decisions. Besides both Kirkos and Clary are mature individuals, they'll be fine.

I suppose I'm just over thinking things, but there wasn't much else to do, it was a lazy Sunday afternoon and everyone seemed to be inside relaxing, or visiting home.

My phone pinged just as I was about to allow myself to fall into the mercy of my thoughts.

What are you doing? Instantly my cheeks warmed, Mr Dimaano always seemed to catch me off guard.

Nothing. That's good keep it clean, keep it suave, keep him guessing.

Have you finished your homework Miss Devout? My cheeks burned.

No.

And why not? I sighed how am I supposed to be confident and mature and tell him I couldn't take a nice self portrait if Sally Mann was taking it herself?

None of the pictures are coming out right, I think the lighting is wrecking the exposure. In reality I just don't seem to have a graceful face. Usually I find people in black and white have a certain innocence about them, a mystery, I look foolish and not 'timeless' at all.

Come over. And bring your camera. My heart jumped, I was a bit nervous about showing him my photos. I quickly put on some light make up, a bra, and some pants, and grabbed my camera. Deleting most of the photos until I found about six that were decent, the least embarrassing of the bunch.

Fixing my skirt for the millionth time I stand in angst at his doorway. Usually our visits are before or after school, and I would just be in my uniform, if we were to meet on the weekend I would have already been dressed up to visit my friends, this was the first time I was dressing just for him. So naturally I threw off my pants and changed my outfit a million times.