Apocalypse Rising (Book Four)

The Fires of Pompeii

"You've been here before, then?"

"Mmm," the Apocalypse nodded. "Ages ago. Before you ask, that fire had nothing to do with me." Donna paused to give her a look, and the Apocalypse cleared her throat. "Well, maybe a little bit . . . but I haven't got the chance to look around properly. Coliseum, Pantheon, Circus Maximus . . . you'd expect them to be looming by now." She looked around the city curiously. "Where is everything?" She pointed down an alley. "Try this way?"

"Not an expert, but there's seven hills of Rome, aren't there?" Donna asked when they made it to the piazza. "How come they've only got one?"

The Apocalypse considered the looming mountain, then the ground started to rumble. "Here we go again!" one of the venders shouted, all of them running to try and secure their belongings.

The Apocalypse grabbed Donna's arm, anchoring both of them, both of their faces paling when they realized where they were. "Wait a minute!" Donna cried. "One mountain with smoke! Which makes this - "

"Pompeii," the Apocalypse gasped. "We're in Pompeii! And it's volcano day!"

+++

"The London Blitz is perfect for self-cleaners. Pompeii's nice if you want to make a vacation of it, though, but you've got to set your alarm for volcano day." He laughed, but stopped when he got the glare Rose deemed "the Apocalypse is coming" glare from the Apocalypse. "Getting a hint of disapproval," he said, clearing his throat.

"Take a look around the room," the Apocalypse advised, narrowing her eyes. "This is what your harmless pice of space junk did."

"It was a burnt out medical transporter!" Jack protested. "It was empty!"

"Rose," the Apocalypse called, heading for the door.

"Are we getting out of here?" Rose asked, following her.

"We're going upstairs," she replied.

"I even programmed the flight computer so it wouldn't land on anything living!" Jack continued. "I harmed no one! I don't know what's happening here, but believe me, I had nothing to do with it!"

"You want to know what's happening?" the Apocalypse asked, turning and raising an eyebrow. "Fine. I'll tell you what's happening. You forget to set your alarm clock. Wake up and smell the smoke, Jackie boy. It's volcano day!"

+++

The Apocalypse ran back the way they came, but when they pulled away the curtains to find the TARDIS - "You're kidding," Donna's jaw fell open. "You're not telling me the TARDIS has gone!"

The Apocalypse swallowed. "OK."

Donna looked at her. "Where is it, then?"

The Apocalypse winced. "You told me not to tell you!"

"Oi!" Donna swatted her. "Don't get clever in Latin!"

"Hold on," the Apocalypse held up a finger and ran back to the vender. "Excuse me, excuse me," she smiled charmingly. "There was a box, big blue box, big blue wooden box, just over there. Where's it gone?"

"Sold it, didn't I?" the vender grinned.

The Apocalypse blinked, then glared. "But it wasn't yours to sell!"

"It was on my patch, weren't it? I got fifteen sesterces for it. Lovely jubbly."

The Apocalypse glared. "Who'd you sell it to?"

"Old Caecilius. Look, if you want to argue, why don't you take it out with him? He's on Foss Street, big villa, can't miss it."

"Thanks," the Apocalypse nodded, about to leave, before she ran back. "What'd he buy a big blue wooden box for?"