Head in the clouds.

Chapter Fifteen.

The wind had stopped and the clouds had broken apart making the stars visible, each one standing out from the overpowering darkness of the night. Sitting with legs cross, hands picking at the grass my mind was finding it difficult to order my thoughts.

"Things were defiantly not better before her. Well they were calmer but it was like I was always waiting for something and I had no clue what it was. Maybe she was what I was waiting for."

What am I doing? Amy and Ryan were lying on the floor moaning every couple of minutes out of boredom. It wasn't my fault I had a deadline to finish this book, maybe next time they want to go out they should ignore my existence and then half way through the night send me drunk pictures of them with strippers, that's what normal people do. After finishing the final touches and sending it to my editor I closed my laptop and assessed the scene in front of me. Ryan was throwing pretzels into his mouth, most of them hitting the floor so he was surrounded by an ocean of snacks. Amy was lying on her front staring at her phone whilst almost dribbling. Both looked like they were about to fall asleep at any moment.

"Okay guys I'm done, we're free to go." Standing up from my desk I grabbed my shoes and put them on awkwardly as Amy peeled herself from the floor and Ryan picked up all the food and I pretended not to see him eat some of them. "So where are we going?" I asked slightly distracted by my emails. Amy groaned snapping the computer shut looking me dead in the eyes.

"Right you need to stop working! You do way to much of it and I am staging an intervention, because this just can't continue!"

Three hours later we were wandering the streets after Ryan almost got beaten to death by a bouncer, he will never again forget the words "No trainers in this club, you understand?" I had dropped my phone in the last club after Amy threw it behind the bar because I was checking up to see if my editor had received my work. I had no clue what the time was but quite a few crowds were dancing and yelling in the street, it must have been like 3am that's when people see to forget about public humiliation. Walking, well it was more like staggering and the occasional stumble; down the street we could all sense that there was commotion happening further on. Ryan being a curios soul took off sprinting down the street and I have never seen Amy look so worried for someone in her entire life. Flashes erupted from the cameras; people were everywhere shouting inaudible things. The middle of the crowd was constantly moving as people were trying to force their way through to get to a car parked on the edge of the street. Getting closer Amy rushed forward immersing herself in the situations shouting something about seeing celebrities. Walking hesitantly forward I could make the name people were shouting.

"Cara! Cara over here!" The noise was making my head hurt but butterflies were flying in my stomach when for a fraction of a second I saw her.

"When I got to know her everything changed, it was like everything became heightened and nothing else really mattered. Okay well I had to get my contract changed because I was kind of slacking a bit but we can ignore that."

Cara was running around the apartment trying to find her necklace which she was certain she had left in the living room but wasn't really sure, so she was checking under the bed and chairs and in cupboards, it looked like a good work out. I was sitting at my desk responding to fan mail and tweets.

"Lift up your feet!" Cara huffed.

"What?"

"I need to check under your desk, just in case." I couldn't help but laugh she looked so concerned, I scooted back in my chair allowing her to inspect. She shuffled back looking up and pouted; unsure of what to do I closed my computer and sauntered into the living room. The reason my mum can always find things around the house is not because she's knows everything, it's because she has confidence. I looked under the sofa, table and TV stand, I searched everywhere that could possibly hide a necklace but there was nothing.

"Why is your jewellery not in a drawer of some kind, why am I looking around the floor?" I asked after several minutes of sliding around the floor on my stomach.

"I'm pretty sure I dropped it a couple of days ago but I don't know where!" She was lying on the sofa spread out like a starfish. I crawled over to her side and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead, she relaxed at my touch.

"We're going to find it, don't worry I got this!" I whispered against her cheek. "Just stay here and chill."

It took hours of searching around the apartment but finally I found it near the door. Cara had fallen asleep on the sofa, she looked so peaceful and even though I knew that waking her up would stop her worrying, but she had gotten very little sleep lately. I swept her hair over her shoulder exposing her skin; I placed the cold metal around her neck making sure not to wake her. I slowly picked her up and carried her carefully into the bedroom placing her on the bed and covering her with the duvet, I was actually pretty proud that I didn't accidently drop her or something like they do in romantic comedies.

"You are beautiful." I breathed, she shifted slightly curling up into the sheets.

"Things weren't always great, things got bad sometimes, but they were always outweighed by the good. She is amazing and I think I love her but our lives are so conflicting, the thing's she has to deal with because of her work takes their toll."

"They're just standing outside Cara! Why are they even here?" Paparazzi littered the street below, blocking anyway to get outside. Cara was sitting on the kitchen counter swinging her legs back and forth. She had stayed over for two nights but after a premiere they had followed her back to mine.

"They're going to leave soon; they think we're just friends so everything is going to be fine." I sank down to the floor my back resting against the door. All I could hear were people shouting from down on the street, every now and then someone would shout something abusive and someone else would grab on and shout it louder. I clenched my fists trying to think about anything else. Over the years I had been mobbed but I had never had anything like this, not being able to leave was stressing me out and I had no clue how Cara had dealt with this for the majority of her life.

Hours later not a single person had left the front of my apartment building, sleeping was almost impossible the sounds from outside were getting louder and louder as no one came out of the building for pictures.

"I can't do this; please you have to get them to leave." Cara looked out the window and several flashes from below shone through making me dizzy.

"The only way I can get them to leave is if I leave. Do you want me to leave?" My head was thumping, I was never built for this much exposure and pressure. I couldn't concentrate I shuffled to the bed and flopped down covering my head with as many pillows as possible. The next thing I heard was the door slamming shut and loud voices from the street.

"That's what things had become lately one of us slamming the door on the other one. But even when everything turns to hell with us, I always hear her words in my head or see her face. It's like she's permanently imprinted in my brain."

Charlie shifted beside me sitting up and wiping her hands that were covered in grass on her jeans. Her face was concentrated thinking over everything I had just said.

"Do you think you could ever leave her?" She asked quietly.

"In a way I already have."