Celestial Strings Tied To You

Chapter 15

When we parted ways, I couldn’t shake the emptiness in me.

Can I really do this?

"Ms. Rosendez."

Para akong binuhusan ng malamig na tubig dahil natawag talaga ako sa problem solving na hindi ko naintindihan.

Shit. What should I do?

My hands are trembling as I accepted the whiteboard marker. Nakatalikod ako sa blockmates ko, pero ramdam na ramdam ko ang titig nila sa akin.

I don't even know what to do!

"Sir, I—"

"Sit down."

Then he ended up scolding us. That really ruined not just my day, but me. It ruined me.

Nakakahiya. Wala man lang akong kahit isa na naisulat. But I really studied, so why...? I'm starting to think that I'm not really capable enough to get this degree.

The following days are worse. Sa lahat ng quizzes ko, wala man lang akong naipasa kahit isa. Na para bang palala nang palala ang performance ko sa academics kahit na halos wala na akong tulog dahil sa sobrang pag-aaral.

I even missed a quiz because I fainted before the class. What's worse? I can't take a special quiz because that wasn't a major exam.

This is really exhausting.

I stared at my ceiling and Vince came across my mind, so I dialed his number.

"Julie?"

"Hey."

"Are you okay?"

I told myself I’d listen to him, just like I always used to. But when the line is connected, I don't even know what to say.

"Yeah. How was your day?"

We ended up exchanging updates on how our day went. Walang kwento, walang malalim na usapan. Just two tired voices pretending we still had enough left to share.

"I really miss you, my love. I wish that I could be there with you, but I'm not allowed to go to your house. Lagot talaga ako kay Tito kapag pumunta ako diyan."

"Yeah. It's okay."

"Wait, sasagutan ko muna 'to ha. Goodluck!"

We continued the call even though we're both studying.

That became our set up for the following days. But eventually, the calls stopped. Then our messages became shorter. The messenger became a bulletin board of updates, not a place for us to really talk.

And each time I stared at his name on my screen, I felt that familiar sting.

I tried.

I tried to keep the fire alive. But with everything pressing down on me, I couldn’t help but feel like I was the one smothering the flame.

These days, my mind is clouded a lot of things. I feel so lost and... broken.

Then there's Vince.

I found him at the bleachers by the field, sitting with his bag at his feet, his gaze fixed on nothing in particular. The late afternoon sun cast a soft glow across the grass, but the heaviness in my chest dulled everything. For a moment, I just stood there, wondering if I should even come closer.

But he noticed me eventually.

"Julie," he said while patting the space beside him.

I sat down.