Celestial Strings Tied To You

Chapter 15

CHAPTER 15 - WEIGH OF GOODBYE

"Tres? Seriously, Julie? Ito lang ba ang kaya mo? You have time to date, join orgs, and even go to places with your friends. You should have spent that time studying! Are you even making an effort?"

"Dad, I—"

"Stop disappointing me, Julianna!"

"But I really tried!"

Never in my life have I yelled to my parents. This is the first time I did it. But I ended up crying in front of them.

"Julie..." Mom sounds like she finally cares about me.

But it's too late.

"Ginawa ko naman lahat. Binigay ko lahat ng kaya kong ibigay. I..." My voice cracked. "I am so ruined, Dad. I have been so drained. Trust me, I did everything I could, pero wala talaga. Ito lang ang kaya ko."

They are looking at me. Speechless. Probably because hindi nila inaasahan na magiging ganito ako?

Miserable.

"There are times na gusto ko nang bumitaw, pero hindi ko ginawa dahil paano nalang ang effort niyo. Paano nalang ang lahat ng sakripisyo ko? But unfortunately, you don't even know that."

"Julie—"

"You disregard my pain because you think your pain is greater than mine!" Matapos kong sabihin iyon ay nagmamadali akong pumunta sa kwarto ko.

I don't know how to face them now.

"Julie?" Bumukas ang pinto ng kwarto ko at pumasok si Kuya. "You should go back."

I'm confused, but I packed up my things.

Buti naman makakaalis na ulit ako rito. It feels like I'm being caged in here.

"Kuya, how did you survive our parents' expectations?"

Kuya is driving me back to my house. I don't know what changes in my parents' minds, but they let me go back.

I don't know. And I don't care. All I want is to be alone.

"Don't live up to their expectations." Kumunot ang noo ko. "The more that you live up to their expectations, the more they expect more from you. So a piece of advice, live for yourself. At the end of the day, it's you who has to handle everything for yourself. Don't wait until you have nothing left."

Natahimik ako.

And Kuya's words remained in my mind even though days have passed already.

"Julie."

We live next door but we barely see each other. And I was so busy surviving that I almost forgot about Vince.

"Happy monthsary, Julie."

When was the last time we celebrated our monthsary? Hindi ko na maalala. But now, here he is. Handing me a bouquet of roses.

"Thank you." I smiled as I accepted the flowers.

"Come here." He welcomed me with a warm hug. "I miss you so much, my love."

I could feel the love that we have for each other. Pero ewan ko ba, parang iba na talaga. There’s something missing. We’re acting like strangers now.

Distant.

Even in his arms, I felt the gap widening. His warmth was there, but it no longer reached the deepest parts of me.

I wanted to believe that love was enough. That holding on would fix what was breaking. But the truth is, love alone can’t carry us anymore. Not when my dreams demand sacrifices. Not when my heart feels heavier every time I try to keep us together.