saving nash(suicidal Nash Grier fanfic)

chapter 29

(Becas POV)

I can't do this anymore... it's been about a week since Nash and I broke up.
I've passed him walking down the street and he couldn't even look at me.

I've fucked everything up. I might as well try and text him again..

B: Nash..please.. I'm sorry.. can we just pretend none of this ever happened.

After about four minutes I got a reply

N: no Beca

The memory came back A tear rolled down my face.

" beca..Youre all the help I need"

"No nash"

Then I slammed the door in his face... that was the last thing I said to him...
I'm such a fuck up.

Why did Brandons opinion matter anyways...?

I pushed that thought out of my head.. it wasn't his fault. I didn't have to listen to him.. that was all me.. stupid, ugly, me

Before I knew it I was crying over everything in my life..

I Want to die... I want to be dead.

Then I could cry onto my mother's shoulder and have her tell me it's all better now.

I walked down the hall, glaring at Brandon with teary eyes, through the Crack of his bedroom door.

I quietly cried stepping hastily down the stairs and scurrying into the kitchen.

I grabbed a butter knife out of the drawer, quickly shoving it in my sweater and running out the front door.

I ran, and ran. Until I found myself at the bridge... the bridge where Nash and I shared so many memories.

I collapsed with tears onto the bench we'd always sit at and mindlessly beat the wood with my shaking hands.

After a good five minutes, I sat up, whipped my tears, and took a deep breath. Every part left inside of me going numb.

I took the butter knife out of my pocket and carved into the wood of the bench

N A S H :

I set the butter knife down and pulled my black sweater over my head, placing it on the bench underneath his name.
Letting the tears flow one last time, I untied my Converse shoes and placed them on top of my sweater.

The tears stopped coming from my eyes, but I let them stain my face.

I approached the small Gate that guarded the water beneath me, and silently climbed to the other side of it.

I'm just a girl that loved a boy that didn't love himself... and it broke Me..

I closed my eyes one more time,and moved my blonde hair behind my ears, whispering to myself

"Nash Grier"

Before I let go of the gate that was holding my frail soul, and took one step forward. Letting the harsh wind carry my body to the fate I'd prescribed.

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Story is not over yet :) <3