If I Stayed | Christian Yu

CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE - SAINT / 1 DAY LEFT

"Yeah."

"If the timing was different..."

Christian smiled faintly. "We wouldn't be having this conversation in a parking lot."

She let out a soft breath. Almost a laugh.

"I should go," she said.

He nodded. "Okay."

She turned, walked a few steps, then stopped.

"I'll see you tomorrow?"

Christian looked at her for a long moment.

"Yeah," he said. "You will."

Christian's aprtment

The hallway was dark when he got in.

He pushed the key into the lock, turned it slowly, and stepped inside. The apartment was quiet - just how he left it. Studio door cracked. Lights off.

Then-

"Yo."

Christian flinched so hard he almost dropped his keys.

He turned, heart thudding, and saw a familiar figure sprawled on his couch. Hoodie. Slides. Bag of snacks on his chest like he lived there.

Kazuo raised a lazy hand and waved the spare key in the air.

"Don't be mad," he said, grinning. "I'm staying here tonight."

Christian stared. "Bro-"

"Just to keep an eye on you," Kazuo added quickly. "Y'know. For mental health reasons. Support. Vibes. Emotional safety."

Christian blinked.

Kazuo patted the pillow next to him. "You're welcome."

Christian dropped his jacket by the door, still staring. "How long have you been here?"

"Long enough to eat the rest of your cereal. Also, your fridge sucks. We need to go shopping."

Christian let out a slow sigh and rubbed his face. "You can't just show up like this."

"Sure I can," Kazuo said. "I'm your manager. Also, your unofficial emotional sponsor."

Christian walked toward the kitchen. "I'm not twelve."

"Never said you were. But after tonight? After her? I figured maybe don't let you spiral into sad boy mode alone."

Christian poured himself a glass of water. "I'm fine."

Kazuo snorted. "Okay. And I'm Beyoncé."

Christian leaned on the counter, staring at the floor.
He wasn't going to lie.
It was nice. Knowing someone was there. Even if it was just Kaz being a weirdo on his couch.

"Thanks," he said finally.

Kazuo stretched out like he owned the place. "Anytime. I got the good side of the couch anyway."

Christian smirked, finished his water, then nodded toward the studio door. "Gonna go work on something for a bit."

Kazuo gave him a two-finger salute. "Go be tortured and brilliant."

Christian walked towards his studio, closed the door behind him and locked it.

Studio light on. Phone face-down. No distractions.

Kazuo was passed out on the couch in the other room, breathing like a grown man who had zero shame about uninvited sleepovers.

Christian sat at the mic, headphones on.
The rough track was already loaded.
He'd built it earlier, simple chords, a moody loop, minimal drums.

Now it was time.

He leaned in. Hit record.

First take was trash.
Second was okay.
Third was the one that made his hands shake.

You still wake me up from the dead
Filling up my thoughts with regrets
Will I ever let you go?
Will I ever let you go-go?

His voice cracked a little on that last line, but he kept going. Didn't stop. Didn't flinch.

Eyes closed now.
Head against the back of the chair between takes.

The words hit too close.
He let them.

I burn everything you left in me
Then all your cries are ecstasy
And I am no saint
And I am no saint

His hand hovered over the pad.
He triggered the beat drop.

The studio filled with electricity.

Not just sound.. feeling.
That pulsing synth. That buzzing low-end. That chaos.
It was everything he didn't say out loud. Everything that poured out after the kiss. After the goodbye. After pretending he was fine.

No lyrics. Just the beat.

He sat there, headphones still on, staring straight ahead.

She would never hear this version. Not unless he let her.

But in that moment, he didn't care about who would listen or what it meant or whether it made sense on a tracklist.

This wasn't a song.

It was a confession.

And it was hers.

____

Oh my days you guys, 1 day left before Aaliyah will get married!

What do you guys think will happen?

Will she choose for Christian ... or Fabian?

🖤✨️

To be continued...