Beomgyu had been in countless heartbreaking relationships. Right after he was just dumped by another partner, Yeonjun comes into his life uninformed. Will beomgyu survive high school with a broken heart?
Dear Diary, What's this feeling? I can't really explain it well, but it feels like my heart is eating me alive. In short, Beomgyu got drunk at Yuna's party. It all happened so fast.. it was like I woke up from a dream. To sum everything up, Taehyun forced me to drag him away since he wanted to talk to Kai, and I'm not really sure how, but now he's sound asleep.
Gosh he's like a little baby. I could get used to this honestly, it's refreshing after hearing loud pop music that could possibly burst out my eardrums all night. Here.. the music seems to fade away, replaced by Beomie's snoring. I'm not sure why I feel like this, but the sound he makes while sleeping is really adorable.
I'm lucky I accidentally brought you here, I would've been so bored if I didn't. Beomie is really cute while sleeping, I still can't get over it.. I thought coming here would be a bad idea, although nothing bad really happened. I cleared up everything with Yuna and even became friends. She's a really nice girl, I don't deserve her honestly.
My tummy is doing weird circles again, probably because of all the beer I drank earlier.. I should've known better. But speaking of parties, I'm really curious about what happened to mom that day. What was dad talking about? What did he mean by 'if I hadn't gone to that party, she would still be here'? Was dad the cause of mom's death? What happened to her?
I know dad is not innocent, he's trying his best to act like everything's okay, but even a five year old child would notice his sudden changes. Every mood switch, every time he silently prays under the night sky filled with glistening stars, I know. I know everything. I know he hides a big stash of illegal items in his secret basement, I know he has a whole illegal operation running. I know his hands are dirty. But he's my dad, what am I supposed to do?
Sometimes I wonder, is it better to be poor and stay safe or be rich and possibly get shot any moment. I've seen many in dad's operation get killed before, some got shot while driving, some died by poisoning. They all died in different ways, a different path, yet everyone of them had the same ending. Death.
Which always makes me wonder, will dad end up like them?
And if he does, how so?
There's so many questions popping up in my head, I have to find out the whole story. No one tells me anything, it's frustrating. Really.
I still remember the letter I found when I was six. It was a love letter from mom to dad. It's really annoying how I can't remember where it was now. I remember tearing up while reading it, it was a really emotional letter. I'm sad dad never got to see it, maybe it would've stopped him from where he is now. To this day.. I'm still trying to figure out where my six year old self would've possibly hid that letter. Maybe in my sock closet? Or maybe in my favourite story book? There are so many possibilities, I even remember spending hours looking for it a few years back.
I still feel guilty that I got to read it instead of dad, he should've been the one hiding the letter, not me. What was I even thinking.. I was so dumb and childish. I guess I thought it was fun.
Oh my gosh, Beomie is starting to wake up, I better take care of him now or Taehyun will throw a tantrum at me again, seriously he's so grumpy!
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