Define irreplaceable.

20: 2 truths and a lie

I wake up. Fuck.

..

I can't live like this.

I drive to school. It's around when practice ends.

I wait for him.

The schoolyard is empty. The air is cold, biting. The sky is dark, the last traces of daylight fading behind the buildings. Streetlights flicker, casting long, sharp shadows across the pavement. The world feels too quiet. Too big. Too empty.

Tsukkishima stands near the gate, shifting on his feet. He looks worse than before—hollowed out, sleep-deprived, like he's been running on fumes and self-loathing alone. He doesn't know if Yamaguchi will take this route home. But if he does—if he does—then this is his last chance. He's more nervous and terrified of rejection than he's ever been before.

And then—I see him.

He looks cold. Unforgiving, not even talking with our teammates. His eyes are hooded and he lost the type of energy and charm he used to give out. He looks serious.

My breath catches at the sight. I missed him so much, he's right there—but it doesn't feel like he is. It feels fake.

I force my body to move before I'm ready.

"Yamaguchi-"

He doesn't even turn around. Doesn't even glance at me. Just keeps walking. He's never done that before.

"Yamaguchi, wait."

Y: "No."

My heart sinks.
Jesus Christ—I broke him.
He's not even willing to listen.

I knew he wasn't going to give me the time of day. I wouldn't either. So, I did the only thing I knew how to do. The thing I really don't want to do, but the only thing that might catch his attention.

I wait a second, contemplating hard, and

I drop to my knees.

He hears the noise of my knees hitting against the pavement and turns around. He looks confused, unwelcoming.

Y: "Get off the floor."

"No."

I bow down, forehead to the ground,
full Dogeza.

He's shocked, trying not to believe it, trying to ignore it but it's so foreign that I would even consider bowing down to another person.

"Please.. please just- listen to me. Just for a second."

I'm begging.
I'm on my hands and knees and I'm begging him to stay. Trembling.

He looks like he doesn't want to believe what's happening, like he was trying to forget about me until this happened, and he can't ignore it.

He looks like he doesn't want to forgive me, but he hates how it looks so... real. Genuine.

He stays, but something in his stance tells me he might force himself to walk away at any second.

"I'm so sorry. I- I should've rehearsed this better, I just- I.. please don't walk away-"
I start to shake a bit and clench my jaw not to cry. My hands grip the pavement and my fingers dig into the dirt. Clenching my fists like it's holding me together with tape and glue.

"I understand why you did what you did, and I'm so so sorry it took me so long to realize. I mean it with everything that I have when I say I will get better. For you, and for myself. I ca- I can't lose you, Tadashi. You're all I have, you're all I want, you're everything to me. I c- I can't-"
My head is down, to the cement.