No strings attached |(UNDER REVISION)

Chapter 36- Letting go

Everything blurred together-the pain, the exhaustion, the unbearable weight crushing my chest.

I tried to take a breath, but the world tilted. My legs wobbled, my body swayed. Too much. This is too much.

"Mikha!" Sheena's voice rang in my ears, distant and muffled.

I barely felt their hands trying to steady me. My knees buckled. The pavement rushed toward me.

Darkness.

The last thing I heard was Stacey screaming my name before everything faded into nothing.

_____

A piercing beep echoed in my ears.

The scent of antiseptic filled my nose. My body felt unbearably heavy, like I was sinking into the hospital bed.

I blinked against the harsh white light, my vision adjusting to the sterile room. The steady beeping of the heart monitor was the only sound breaking the silence.

"Mikha..."

I turned my head slowly.

Sheena sat beside my bed, her eyes swollen from crying. Stacey was next to her, arms crossed tightly over her chest, looking like she was barely holding herself together.

"Where..." My voice cracked, my throat dry.

"You collapsed," Sheena said, voice trembling. "You wouldn't wake up."

Memories crashed into me all at once. The wedding. The kiss. The way Aiah looked at me before walking away.

The pain returned like a blade to my chest.

I closed my eyes, swallowing hard.

"It's over," I whispered.

Neither of them answered.

Because they knew it too.

A shaky breath left my lips as I stared at the ceiling, trying to keep the tears at bay. But it was useless. My voice trembled as I spoke.

"Sheena... Stacey... Ang sakit." My voice cracked, and my whole body shook. "It hurts so much I don't know how to breathe."

Sheena reached for my hand, squeezing it tightly, but it did nothing to stop the ache inside me.

"I gave her everything," I choked out. "Lahat. I loved her with everything I had, and still... she left. She chose him."

A tear slipped down my cheek. "I begged. I humiliated myself in front of everyone, and she still walked away."

Stacey clenched her fists. "Mikha, you have to stop doing this to yourself-"

"How?!" I snapped, my voice rising. "How do I stop?! Tell me, Stacey. Because I don't know how!"

Sheena's face crumpled, and Stacey looked away, unable to answer.

I let out a bitter laugh, my chest rising and falling rapidly. "I thought maybe... just maybe... she still loved me enough to fight. But she didn't."

The truth crushed me, suffocating, relentless.

A sob broke free from my lips as I whispered the words I had been too afraid to say.

"She never chose me."

A hollow, bitter laugh escaped my lips. I shook my head as more tears streamed down my face, my chest tightening with every shaky breath I took.

"Reason?" I repeated, my voice raw with pain. "You think Aiah had a reason?"

Stacey hesitated but nodded. "Mikha... you know Aiah. She loves you so much. Maybe-"

"Maybe what?" I cut her off, my voice trembling. "Maybe she did this to protect me? Maybe she was forced? Maybe there's some tragic reason behind all of this?" I scoffed, shaking my head. "Kahit anong reason meron siya, Stacey, it will never be valid enough to justify this pain. She broke me. She left me there, begging-humiliating myself in front of everyone-and she still walked away."

I let out a sharp, humorless laugh, gripping my chest as if it could stop the ache. "Kung mahal niya ako, bakit niya ako sinaktan ng ganito? You don't protect someone by destroying them. And that's exactly what she did, Stacey."

Sheena swallowed hard, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. Stacey looked like she wanted to say something, but no words came out.

I exhaled shakily, my voice barely above a whisper now. "Mas masakit pa ang ginawa niya. Parang pinatay niya na rin ako nang paulit-ulit." My lips trembled as I let out a broken sob. "I would've rather taken any other pain than this."

Silence settled between us, heavy and suffocating.

Because deep down, we all knew the truth.

No matter what Aiah's reason was, it didn't change the fact that she chose to hurt me.

And that was something I might never be able to forgive.

Sheena reached out and placed a firm but gentle hand on my shoulder. "Mikha," she said softly, her voice laced with concern. "You need to rest."

I let out a weak, bitter laugh. "How am I supposed to rest, Sheena?" My voice cracked as I looked at her, desperation filling my eyes. "How do I sleep knowing that the person I love just promised forever to someone else?"

Sheena sighed, tightening her grip on me. "You've been crying for hours. You're exhausted. You're running on nothing but pain, and if you keep this up, your body will give out."

Stacey nodded, kneeling beside me. "Sheena's right, Mikha. You need to take care of yourself."

I shook my head stubbornly, tears still slipping down my cheeks. "What's the point?" My voice was barely above a whisper now. "The one person who made me feel alive is gone."

Sheena exhaled sharply and cupped my face, forcing me to look at her. "And you're still here, Mikha. You're still breathing. I know it feels impossible now, but one day, you'll get through this."

I wanted to believe her. I really did.

But at that moment, all I could feel was the unbearable weight of losing Aiah.

"Come on," Stacey urged gently. "At least lie down. Even if you don't sleep, just rest."

I didn't have the strength to argue anymore. My body was trembling, my head pounding from all the crying.

So, with the last bit of energy I had left, I let them help me up, guiding me to the bed.

And as I lay there, staring blankly at the ceiling, the pain in my chest remained-aching, relentless.

Because no matter how much they told me I'd be okay...

I wasn't sure I ever would be.