The Cradle in the Dark

Embaressment

@Harry’s POV@

It’s been a month, a month since the babies were born. Three weeks since Grayson came home and two weeks since Bentley came. The hardest part of being a parent so far has been the day we were told Grayson could come home with us because he had no difficulties breathing but Bent had to stay. Bent had to breathe through an oxygen mask for three days after he was born and needed to gain a few more ounces before the doctors said he could come home. But now we were all home.

I feel so bad for poor Niall though. Having a caesarean took so much out on your body and all I wanted to do was sleep and take pain meds to keep the burning in my stomach to a minimal.

Another thing we found out after the twins were born was that I can actually breast feed. Well, not actually breast feed, more like nipple feed, I guess. But we found out the day after the twins arrived and I completely freaked out and the doctors rushed in. They told me that as long as I didn’t feed them from my nipples than the milk would dry and eventually would go away. Of course I, still wanting to feel like a man, said I would do that and the babies would drink from a bottle.

Then that one night I woke up to one of the boys crying, Grayson to be correct, crying and wanting a bottle. Niall had barely gotten any sleep the last few days so I felt so bad when I turned to tell him to get a bottle prepared. So I didn’t. I tried to get out of the bed but the pain medication had worn off and the burning returned to my stomach right above my belly button. I muttered profanities under my breath as I leaned over to pick up the screaming Grayson from the bassinette next to the hospital bed and sighed hiking up my gown and placed his face towards my nipple. Of course I had no idea what the heck I was doing and kept cooing at Grayson and trying to get him to latch on.

After about ten minutes of trying I finally got him to suck and was relieved when the pressure was gone from my nipples and my son stopped crying. I looked down and saw that his eyes were staring up at me with his bright blue eyes. Niall thought it was a shame neither of the boys got my gem stone eyes but I completely disagreed. The boys eyes just made it a thousand percent easier to fall in love with when you’re staring into the mirror image of the ones you’ve grown to love for over two years now. Grayson’s eyes never left mine as he continued to feed and I felt something tickle my insides.

It felt so right. It was such a cherished and prized moment I knew it wouldn’t be the last time.

And I was right. It’s exactly 1:34 in the morning and I’m sitting here with Bentley’s fragile body pressed to my warm chest as he feeds for the second time in four hours. I gently bent down and kissed his tiny head and rubbed my thumb over the dribble that fell onto his chin. His eyes stayed closed and I turned to see Niall rubbing his eyes and gently burping Grayson, who had just been fed.

Our moms were sleeping in a hotel tonight and it was the first time since the babies came home that they had gotten to sleep through the night.

“Ni, baby when you finished burping him, put him into his crib and then bring the bassinette from the living room into here so you can rest while I put Bent to bed,” I whispered like a ghost as Bentley let out a little gurgle before turning his head away from me and spitting up the access milk.

I grabbed a burp cloth from Niall and wiped it off. Grayson let out a quite hiccup before bringing up his extras onto Niall’s shoulder. Of course it hit right where the burping cloth ended so his face twisted before leaning Grayson on his lap, between his two legs to keep his straight and wiped the milk of his shirt and grabbed Grayson from his lap and carried him to the boys’ room right across the hall. You heard Niall’s soft singing and soon the door click close to know Grayson had fallen asleep.