Chapter 19

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The funeral was cold and quiet.

Everything was black and white to Phil, holding a sleeping Rosie in his arms, as she snored against his dark suit.

Phil remained in a grief-stricken daze, barley mumbling to those who walked past him. Chris and PJ were trying, trying so hard, fake smiling and shaking hands with every person at the visitation, while Dan's parents were hugging and exchanging tales of Dan as a child.

Phil passed Rosie off to Chris, who took the hint that he needed time alone, to which Phil went outside to cry behind the building.

He needed to go inside. Talk to Dan's family. He owed Dan that.

The paramedics, after getting Dan's crumpled and bleeding body out of the car, had told Phil that Dan had died on impact, and he had lost too much blood to, if he had survived the hit, lived much longer. One of them had told Phil he'd done the right thing, getting the child out of the car first. She spoke it as if Dan didn't matter, and it made Phil angry.

Flowers had been supplied by Violet's and Virtues, and Phil had picked them out himself. There was a small collage of memory photos in the corner, which people stopped to look at.

Dan, in the casket, looked so peaceful. In a black and grey suit, with his dark brown hair combed in a left fringe, still wearing his silver and black wedding ring. Phil smiled at his gold and white ring. They'd been told they were as different as night and day, and Phil's ring had several flowers printed in the golden medal, and the bit holding the white stone in was carved like a sun. Dan's was the same, except the silver band had stars, and the black gem was held by a crescent moon.

Phil swept a small strand of loose hair from Dan's forehead, before pulling a small smile, happy at what they'd had. Phil would raise Rosie, and she'd grow up. Even though, Phil would wish Dan was there to see her.

Dan was buried later that day, whilst it rained. Everyone was wearing black, with their black umbrellas and sad looks. The raindrops bounced off the icy, cold, grey stone. The words " DANIEL JAMES HOWELL" made a pang in Phil's heart. He laid a small cluster of dandelions, as well as roses and lilies, over the tilled dirt in front of the headstone.

Rosie, who had been handed off to Mrs. Howell during the visitation, and was going to their house for a couple weeks while Phil tried to...get "better", still slept. Phil wondered how it would be to explain everything to Rosie when she got older. But that was something for another time, Phil had enough to worry about.

Shadows of the twilight crept up on Phil, as he headed to his car after spending the whole afternoon and evening with Dan. Talking, apologizing, crying, hoping for a miracle. Phil wished it had been the other way around. How he wished.

Phil was tired, no, exhausted. Tears blurred his vision as he stepped on the gas.

60...70...80...he surpassed 90 within the minute. Hardly anyone was out on those country back roads, Phil sped out of the gates, and felt like he was flying. Flying high enough to be with Dan. That was what he wanted. To be with Dan again. His foot was on the floor of the car, the gas all the way down. Through his thoughts, he didn't notice the red lights of a train starting up, and hearing the long, hallowing honks as it drew nearer. Within a last moment, Phil realized what was happening, and prayed as he found he couldn't slow down. As the car neared the train, he swallowed, crying as he heard it to his right, about to come nearer.

The car wouldn't brake. Phil counted down.

5...

...4...

He heard a final honk as the train driver told him to get out of the way.

...3...

...2...

He prayed, trying stop.

...1...

This was the end. The end of their story.




























Phil gasped himself awake. His heart was hammering in his chest, and he felt around, realizing he was sitting in a chair. The lights of hospital monitors, beeps, and chimes could be heard. Phil flipped on the light, and sighed with relief.

Thee was Dan, with a bandage around his head, hooked up to several machines, but otherwise all right. Phil smiled with happiness, letting out a small laugh. It had all been a dream. Dan hadn't hit as hard as they had thought, and was sleeping through the pain and the medicine they had given him. Phil suddenly remembered the nurse saying the doctor said he could check out the next week. Rosie was with Dan's parents.

Everything was all right.

Everything was okay.

Phil held Dan's hand as he slept, thumbing his silver ring before crying with happiness. His Dan. Daniel Howell. Was okay. Safe. Healing.

This wasn't the end of their story.

But a whole new beginning.

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