Life was simple, easy, safe despite the nagging of others demanding to know what Y/n wanted to do with her life she had little to complain about.
Still she wished the sea would take her, she didn't want to worry about where her life was headed, she...
Night had cast its hue over the land; the slimmer of light offered by the crescent moon offered minimal light as we ventured further through the trees masking our army.
The night before as I sat humming a tune to myself to ease my nerves which had kept me up, Uhtred approached me. His words still echoed loudly in my head.
~~~
"I'm a dead man." I whisper into the dead of night, eyes cast upon the stars above.
That night when I trained with Ragnar and Steapa it was as if everything I had learned over the last two weeks was for nothing. I stumbled and tripped, almost took off my own arm and folded into a fetal lie when Steapa yelled at me trying to teach me the art of intimidation.
'Pathetic.'
"You're not going to die, Y/n. Don't be such a coward." Uhtred asserts seating himself next to me to watch the stars.
With an air of a laugh I turned to look at the man next to me. "If I do die will you call me a hero?"
"Probably." Uhtred grumbles.
"But whilst I'm still alive I'm a coward." I teased bumping my shoulder with his. Anyone could tell from my jests I was trying to cover up my real feelings.
The dread which bubbled beneath the surface.
"It's the way these work. You get the glory when you're not around to appreciate it." Uhtred chuckles joining in on my banter.
"Well, unless you're you." I said lowly. "Or a king, a lord... anything but ... a peasant." My tone turned dull, my inner turmoils dripping through with each word.
Fear, it hung in the air around me. I could feel it, Uhtred most certainly sensed it. Everyone in the camp could see it written on my face beneath the mask it tried to conceal it with.
"Status has to have some advantages." Uhtred fires back his time trying to lift my spirits once more.
"You do have some really loyal friends." I hum, glancing over my shoulder at Finan, Clapa and Sihtric who sat before the fire we'd made.
Taking my shoulders, Uhtred forces me to face him asserting the words he spoke, eyes staring into my own.
"You're right, I do. Friends who are extremely brave, and incredibly loyal to be honest, not at all cowardly." His hands moved from my shoulder cupping my face.
"Thank you..." I whisper trailing off as I glanced down at my hands in my lap. Uhtred hands still cupping my cheeks. "For protecting me, standing up for me when we were slaves, comforting me. Uhtred without you I'd long be dead. I fear I can never repay you for all that you have done."
"You do not need to thank me, it is I that should be thanking you." Uhtred speaks quietly as I scoff and look away. Taking my chin between his thumb and index finger he turns me to him once more.
"You protected Halig, Finan and I from Sevrri's whip more times than I can count. You risked your health to ensure we did not go hungry. You took an arrow to the leg when we tried to escape." Uhtred reminds slightly shaking my face with each act of bravery I'd committed.
"These acts of bravery, loyalty and kindness makes me proud to call you my friend. You are too good a woman. You'll always have my protection. Though I doubt you'll need much of it, you are strong, you just can't see it yourself." Uhtred placing his forehead on my own strokes, my cheeks, a moment of silence settling between us, his words sinking in.
"It is what any human would do." I say quietly.
"No... it is what Y/n would do." He shakes his head to deny my claim, pulling away and kissing the top of my head before standing up.
"I am glad to have you fighting by my side tomorrow. I could wish for no finer friend." With that he walked away allowing me to sit and ponder everything he'd said.
Surely my acts of kindness could not have been enough to mask my frail fragility. I'll admit my time spent as a slave helped me develop some muscle in the arms despite the scrawny appearance which lays beneath the clothes I wear.
Did Uhtred really hold my acts in that high regard that he was honoured to have met me? Have me fighting by his side?
Was I really not seeing the full picture intent on only seeing the weak person reflected back at me in the water.
With questions swarming my head I huff a breath of air in an attempt to clear the slew of thoughts, I needed to rest, with exhaustion heavy on my shoulders, I stand.
Joining the boys by the fire I nestled myself across from Sihtric, gracing each man with a smile declining Finan's offer of ale as I announced my need for rest.
~~~
To Be Continued
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