*NEW STORY LIVE NOW!*
Hello you beautiful pile of skin and organs, welcome aboard this journey! The destination is unknown but it's ok - we're in this together. Oh, how rude, I haven't even introduced myself yet. My name is Miz Mic, 17 Year Old Hip Hop artist, music blogger and fluent sarcasm speaker.
**Disclaimer** not everything I write is going to be grammatically or punctually correct so if you're extremely passionate about the English language I'm afraid we're going to have to escort you off this fun train immediately but thanks for stopping by! (phew she's gone, she's such a bitch!...what do you mean she's still here?)
For those of you who are reading this expecting genuine self help for a ruined life I'm afraid it's gonna take more than a quirky teenager sat at a computer to solve those problems. However, I may be of assistance in the way that I'll be uploading a new page every week and although I'm not able to solve your problems I can act as a distraction from them, because how do you face tough situations? That's right, you don't, you just run away to the dark endless portal that is the internet.
If you haven't already guessed by the lack of structure this book (if we're going to call it that) this is simply just a stream of consciousness, if there's something that I think you need or would want to hear about I'll stick it in here
On with the book,
Choo Choo M'f*cker!!
YOU ARE READING
How To: Not Completely Ruin Your Life (#Wattys2015)
HumorAre You Looking For Serious Self Help? ...No? PERFECT! Congratulations On Getting This Far, Other Candidates Have Not Fared So Well (this means they died.) First Time Book Writer, Long Time User Of Words - I Imagine This Is Very Reassuring. So This...
