Helpline: An Agony Aunt Advice Book

Entry 1: Dating friends

LonelyKnights_13 from Why?

"Ok, I have a problem. Well, I have a crush on one of my best friends. (I know people say not to like like your friends but I can't help it) His name is Michael and he's VERY close to me. I have told him I have a crush on him and he's fine with it, he said maybe we could date or something in highschool. But now I feel like I'm in a sort of a odd limbo between best friend and future girlfriend, mixed with friend-with-benefits. What do I do?"

This is a very... delicate topic, changing with every situation and person. My advice to you would be to do what makes you most comfortable. It might sound very typical, but people say it so much for a reason. Is Michael the romantic type? If so, can you imagine being with him comfortably? Would you be OK with holding his hands around your friends, cuddling up to him in public or in private? If the answer to these questions is yes, then go for it! Be that future girlfriend and let him love you for the amazing girl you are. Express how much you like him and embrace your love for him, I'd support you 100%

However, if you don't see any of these scenarios successful with him, tell him how you feel. Tell him if you're scared of losing the friendship, the biggest problem in most relationships I have witnessed at school is lack of trust and communication. I think that you should trust him with your thoughts because if you two are VERY close like you insist, trust is something you both should have in eachother. I wish that I knew you on a more personal level, so I could tell you exactly what to do. But I don't, so I'm giving you the best advice I can. Don't let your heart blind your brain but let your feelings free. I know that a conversation about your feelings can be awkward but you are so much more free afterwards.

Believe me, if he doesn't respond well, he is probably just hiding his reaction behind the wall that society encourages every man to build around himself. Boys are lead to believe that they must act emotionless in order to seem manly and that being feminine is bad. Tell him otherwise, let him be himself with no judgement. Tear down the society stereotype wall with him. But back onto subject of what you should do, follow your gut instinct. My biggest job for you to do is tell people what you think. Opinions are beautiful things, embrace them. Please tell me below whether my advice is any good or if you think this was carbon copy rubbish, if I missed any huge gaps or skipped past obvious flaws. Everyone has an opinion and you telling me yours will give me a better perspective of the situation. Communication and understanding are the best human skills in my own personal opinion.

From ciaramaeflower xxx

P.s. I found the picture above to remind you to not let that happen. If you feel too awkward or uncomfortable to be around him, at least leave off on a good note so you could be friends on the future when any tension is gone. I am probably the worst person to give advice because I don't really understand human feelings very well so I have no idea why I began this book.