If It's With You

023- Telling him

I won't forget the words she said to the person on the other end of the phone. Which was; "They don't like people like us very much." Those words have lived with me all my life.

I wouldn't go to the police, I would figure out a way to get rid of Carl. But first, I would have to get more pepper spray to protect myself.

"I don't know, are we just going to sit back and-"

"Stop Jul," Nicklaus's cold tone broke the silence and all eyes shifted to him, except mine which was pointed to the glass of water in front of me. "You need some rest, Muna. Let me take you home." I heard him say, his steps moving closer to me.

"Yes, I think you should get some rest first, but we will have to talk about this again," Andrew said, glancing between me and Nicklaus.

Julia helped me put my stuff together and after I shared a hug with them, I quietly followed Nicklaus out. And silently, we drove back to the apartment with the only words being said was him asking if I was okay.

__________

I pushed my door open and sauntered into my apartment. As I walked into my living room, I heard Nicklaus close the door behind me. I needed some time alone but there was no need to tell him that, because I knew he wouldn't for even a second agree to leave.

And for some reason, I didn't completely want him to leave. I just didn't want him to witness what I had been holding in. The fear, the pain and the overthinking that had gripped me. The anxiety that I was trying so hard to hold down and the tears that were slowly clouding my eyes.

Meeting Carl had triggered all of that. It reminded me of all the pain I was running away from. It had filled me with fear, fear that I might not be as safe as I thought.

I placed all my stuff on the kitchen island and ignoring Nicklaus, I walked to my bedroom and rushed into my bathroom. I squatted in front of my toilet and with tears filled to the brim of my eyes, I started to throw up. I couldn't get a hold of myself, and It was as if I wanted to get rid of all the emotions in me.

It was as if I was heartbroken all over again, I was hurting and it felt like the pain was all brand new puncturing holes in my fragile heart. I hated that Carl was here, and I hated that he found me. I hated that he gripped me tightly and I couldn't do anything about that. I couldn't pull away. I was weak and the thought of that got me wanting everything in my stomach to go down the drain. I hated Carl.

I heard my bedroom door being pushed open and some faint steps followed.

"Muna?" Nicklaus called in the warmest tone I hadn't heard in a while now.

I quickly rose to my feet and wiping tears off my cheeks, I walked to the washing sink and turned the tap on. The more I washed my face, the more I sobbed letting tears mix with the water.

"Muna?" I heard my name again and turned the tap off before reaching for a towel. "Can I come in?" Nicklaus asked, and knowing he was still here even though I had ignored him all week, warmed my heart. At least, he still cared about me.

I finished dabbing my face dry and walked to the door. When I pushed it open, Nicklaus was standing there with a slight frown forming between his brows. Upon locking eyes with him, a new stream of tears wet my cheeks as I walked right into his arms like I was being controlled.

Not hesitating, he wrapped his strong arms tightly around me. I missed him and I was sorry. I needed his hug. I needed a friend.

"It's okay, baby." He cooed, his tone melting every inch of me. Is it really okay?

"I am so sorry for avoiding you all week, Nicklaus," I blurted in between sobs, still tightly held in his arms. Even though I was concerned about my tears soaking his shirt, the comfort I felt at that moment was what I needed. And he smelt so nice and warm.