TRAVEL AVATAR

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"Ok, first step here is to choose your avatar," said the travel agent. She was a bird-eyed woman of about thirty, with platinum blond hair rigidly shaped like a viking helmut. Her nose completed the assemble, protruding like a bridge from her forehead, more like a nose-guard than a nose.

"Well, I want it to be a man obviously," I said as she scrolled through pictures of young women.

"There's nothing obvious at all sir. Travel is about exploration. Many of our customers opt to change gender when choosing an avatar," she said. Her tone was irritated and she kept looking at her watch. Then she switched screens to a list of men, ranging from about twenty to fifty years of age.

I pointed my finger at one of the older gentlemen. He had grey hair and a white beard. He resembled me somewhat except I didn't have a beard. Beards weren't permitted in the office culture where I worked. I also died my hair to conceal the grays.

"Really? That one?" she asked. Her eyes widened and jutted outward like a cartoon character.

"Why not? Seems like me."

"I have to remind you again sir that the whole point of having a travel avatar is not to be you. If you want to be you then buy a plane ticket somewhere and go yourself. The point of this service is to enjoy travel through someone else's eyes. Let them sit on the fourteen hour flights, eat the exotic food, and then sit for another fourteen hours on the toilet. Experience travel through someone younger and maybe more attractive. Find out what its like to party all night as a twenty-something, get laid and then go rock climbing the next day."

"Oh, I hadn't really thought of that," I said. I was still confused by the whole thing. I'd been given a gift card for the service by my wife. She told me she hoped it would quash all this talk about wanting to take a long vacation. She said we didn't have time for a long trip, but the travel avatar could take one for me.

"That's what I'm here for," said the travel agent. "To give you ideas. Of course the travel avatar will have their own ideas. Once they're selected neither of us will have much control over where they choose to go next, but there are profile indicators that give us some pretty good clues."

"What does the dollar sign mean?" I asked. I pointed to the yellow dollar symbol glowing above the avatar's photograph.

"Oh, well this one is a little pricey," said the agent. "He prefers five star accommodation and first class flights. The gift card you brought wouldn't cover that, so you'd have to make up the difference."

"I'm not so sure I can afford to make up the difference," I said.

"I'm not so sure you can afford not to," said the agent indignantly. She was looking at me like I was a smelly homeless man who'd wandered into the office. I regretted not having parked my new 7-series BMW closer to the window so she could see me step out of it when I walked through the door. Maybe then she'd show me a little more respect. Now my face was burning with embarrassment.

"What does that mean? I can't afford not to," I asked cautiously. Maybe if I treaded more carefully she'd soften her tone.

"It means that when you go back to the office and tell your colleagues how you invested in a travel avatar for your next vacation, what are they going to think if you tell them you put your avatar up at the Motel 6?"

"Oh, right. I can't tell them that," I said. I hadn't even thought to tell anyone I had a travel avatar actually. I knew traditional vacations longer than a few days were frowned upon. Such people were considered lazy and not serious about their career. They were also considered a bit weird because they indulged in foreign foods and were known to mingle with non-professional class people.

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