Could Have

Chapter 11: W T F

  March 22nd 2008

I slowly opened my eyes.

My body felt like a dumpster fire and I immediately felt a headache coming on. For a moment, I forgot where I was-- I took in my surroundings.
Right, I was in Ashe's dorm room.
He sat slumped over on his desk; soft snores filled the silence.
The events of the night flashed in my brain and I cringed remembering Melanie's lips on mine.
I grabbed my phone, my battery on it's final bar. The time glared back at me and it was almost 6:00am. I knew there would be a bus relatively soon.
Still no texts from Kalen or even Ty.
Actually, there were no texts from anyone- a waved of feeling forgotten washed over me.

I slipped out of the dorm undetected. The sun still hid behind the mountain line; A clear blue sky coated in rays of early morning orange above my head. I could hear birds gossiping in the trees as I passed each building as I headed to the bus stop. Spring was definitely here and all I could feel was unbelievably sore and exhausted.

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Callie's house was  barely awake by the time I arrived. I could see her mom through the kitchen window as she made coffee.
I decided to go around to the back of the house and enter through the basement door.
Luckily, Callie left the door unlocked for me.
Her room was at the very back of the basement right next to her brothers room and so I was extra quiet.
I opened her door and she lay cocooned in her blankets, snoring.
I carefully crawled in beside her and let out a sigh of relief that I could finally rest somewhere familiar.

"So?" Callie mumbled from her cocoon as she emerged: a sleepy butterfly.

"It was... interesting," I hesitated.

"You didn't text me at all and I thought you were dead," Callie wiggled out of her blankets and smacked me on the top of my head.

"There's a good reason for that," I hastily whispered in attempts to escape her wrath.

"Spill it!" she demanded.

I closed my eyes and let my brain empty every detail of the previous night.
Callie gasped and covered her mouth to keep herself from squealing in shock.

"Please tell me you gave Ashe your number," Callie shook me and I winced in hungover pain.

"I..." I  started shuffling through my hazy memories, "I did actually."

"Nice," smirked Callie.

"How is that the only part you care about," I groaned rolling away from her on the bed.

"Are you kidding me?" Callie squealed, "You actually had a college guy interested in you and that wasn't the best part of the night?"

"I was a little preoccupied with being ambushed," I covered my head as I felt the room spin.

"Yeah, that was weird as fuck," Callie grimaced.

"Can we stop talking? I feel like I'm dying," I grumbled in exhaustion.

"I'll get you some water and pain meds," Callie hopped out of bed and disappeared down the hall to the bathroom. A moment later I felt a palm on my shoulder gently shaken. I had fallen asleep and was almost too tired to take the ibuprofen and glass of water that she offered me. 

"Take this and go back to sleep, wild child," Callie giggled and I lazily popped the pills in my mouth and took what started out as a sip of water but quickly turned into a dehydrated chug.

"Thanks," I gasped as I put the empty cup of water on her bedside table. I rolled over to the corner of Callie's bed and closed my eyes. Callie got into bed next to me and we fell asleep back to back.

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My mom came and picked me up around one in the afternoon and by that time I had thankfully sobered up by drinking an entire pitcher and a half of orange juice.
Callie took on her best friend duties and nursed me back to health so that my mom wouldn't suspect that her daughter had lied to her and attended a college party.

"Did you have fun?" my Mom asked when I slumped in the passenger's seat.

"Yeah we just did the usual, nothing exciting," I said trying to sound nonchalant

"Watch any good movies?" Mom prodded.

"Mostly just listened to music actually," I closed my eyes and tilted my head back, "we stayed up way too late though. Remind me not to do that again?"

"Oh, to be young again," Mom laughed as we pulled into the driveway.

"Are you okay if I hide in my room?" I lazily sighed as the car came to a stop.

"Yes, as long as later you help out around the house," Mom unbuckled herself and turned to me.

"Deal," I opened my eyes and looked at her. She stared at me and smiled warmly.

"Okay good," she grabbed my limp hand and kissed the top of it, "love you, now go get some sleep."

I felt a tiny sting of guilt as I nodded. However, all I could think about was how comfortable my bed would be...

My room had remained a chaotic mess from getting ready for the party the day before: a blatant reminder of how stupid I felt. The events of the night flashed through my mind and I shook my head like an etch-a-sketch to get rid of the thoughts.
My laptop sat open on my bed and I eyed it up. I checked my phone one more time and I still hadn't received a text from Kalen, Ty or Melanie....
I jumped onto my bed and double tapped the space bar on my laptop. The screen lit up and instantly I heard pinging from Msnger.

There was a chat box from Kalen flashing.

Kalen: I heard how last night went. I can't believe you tried to kiss my girlfriend. I mean, it's hot but super weird? Melanie didn't like the way you talked shit about me last night... thanks for that. Turns out you were a handful and Melanie doesn't trust you and she thinks that you're really fake.

My eyes widened and I couldn't wrap my head around the paragraph I was reading. Another message followed seamlessly continue the shit show of words.

Kalen: She wants me to block you and honestly I don't see a reason to argue with her. Don't try to contact me, you'll just get me in trouble. Thanks for nothing.

I didn't believe what I was reading.
How was any of what happened my fault?
I replayed the night wondering if the story that Melanie had spun was even close to the night that I experienced.
What a filthy liar she was-- and after talking for so long?

I began furiously typing explaining what happened and how upset I was. I told him how disgusted I was with him that he offered me up to her like a piece of meat. Kalen repulsed me by how he treated me like I was disposable and I made sure he knew. I ripped Melanie a part and how low he must be to use sex as a reason to keep someone like her around.
I clicked enter only to be met with the message of: This person is no longer available on Msnger.

That piece of shit had actually blocked me.

I checked and sure enough Melanie had also blocked me.

I breathed heavy with anger and whipped out my cell phone. I texted Kalen 'hey'  and was met with: this number is no longer in service.

Tears began to well in my eyes as I texted Melanie and was met with the same exact message: this number is no longer in service.

I felt a burning at the back of my throat and immediately opened Nxpage on my laptop. I typed in Kalen's name in the search bar but his page no longer came up.
I typed Melanie's name too and her page was no longer visible.
I went back to my home page and frantically thought of how else I could contact Kalen.

On my homepage were updates and pictures from people on my friends' list. A picture popped up in my feed: Lyle with a really pretty goth girl I didn't recognize. Evidence of what the guys had gotten up to last night. I squinted at the picture and in the background I could see another girl sitting on Ty's lap.
I swallowed hard.
Part of me felt relieved and any guilt I had hanging over me from my encounter with Melanie now fizzled away. The other part of me seared with betrayal thinking about Ty entertaining another girl and that was why he hadn't texted me all night.

As if on cue my phone buzzed with a text.

Callie: DID YOU SEE?!

I wasn't sad but I could feel myself start to cry. A hopelessness invaded my fingers as I texted Callie back.

Kiera: Yeah, I just saw the pic. Kalen also blocked me.

Callie: No way!!!!!!!!!

In my heart I could feel the pit of abandonment that I had spent so much time ignoring.

My phone buzzed beside me.

Ty: Hey babe, busy 2night?

 I could feel white hot rage overflow from me.

Kiera: Fuck off.

I snapped my phone shut and threw it across the room. I buried my head into my pillows and begged for sleep through teary eyes. I wanted this stupid nightmare to end.