Ever Since I Met You

Chapter 2: Is it what I really want?

Kabir's Pov

"Kabir Babyyyyy~" a sugar coated voice calls me. Oh god, not this woman again. not when I'm already stressed. I looked up from my laptop to see a lady wearing a dress that really seemed..... Uncomfortable?, a sly smile on her face. Just not today please. She comes and hugs me from behind. I get up and press a quick kiss on her hair. And get back to my work. She takes a seat next to me, her feet touching mine, and her hand on my arm.

"What's wrong baby? You seem very stressed" Vaani asked. Yes, your presence stresses me out. I wanted to say. But it's not a very good thing to say to your girlfriend is it?

"Nothing just some careless employees" I said. I just fired two workers from work. People these days dont care about anything except themselves. Such undisciplined people I didn't need in my office. 

"Oh baby, don't worry, I know how to ease your stress" she says with a dirty smirk on her face. Is it possible to fire your girlfriend?

"Vaani, not now please. I'm at work. If you don't have anything important for me, just leave" I said firmly, pushing her hand slowly from me. How shameless can a woman get?

"What do you mean "anything important"? Am I not important?" She gasped. What is important right for her to leave before I lost it.

"Vaani, I said not now. I'm not in mood to argue again." I gritted my teeth. I'm losing it. It's been not even two days after our last argument.

"All i want is that my boyfriend pays attention to me right now and not a boss who only cares about his work. Can't you give me that? Don't you love me anymore?" She said with a pout, acting all sad. I don't know if she thinks it's cute because it's not. It makes me wanna punch her. I respect women but sometimes women themselves make me the bad man.

"Vaani please! I said leave before I drag you out of this room! Save that crap for some other day. Not when I'm already dealing with other's bullshit" I yell, getting up from my seat. Others are already looking here. People only care about drama, don't they? Useless people.

She looked startled and took a step back. Her eyes had tears. I did that. I made her cry. She wipes her tears.
"Fine, I'll leave. Happy 4th anniversary, kabir." She said and left. The only thing I hate besides my existence are these anniversaries. Such useless days they are.

I sit down, sighing. I shouldn't be this harsh with her. She just wanted to make me feel special. But she knows how much I loathe all these days. She has been with me for 4 years now.

4 years? Wow. It's been so long. But it's funny how much of a failure my relationship is. Vaani tries, it's not about her. I mean it is but the problem here is me. I'm not even sure if she's  the one I want. If she's the one meant for me. She's can be really annoying but if she's been with me for 4 years, she must really love me. But do i love her? I'm not even sure.
I'm such a failure, why would she still be with me? Probably wants my surname and fame I guess. But is this relationship really what I wanted?

Is this really what I wanted?

In the evening
I reached home at 2 am. All of them must've slept. I park my car and go inside. Just to see my sister, Kirti, studying in the hall. This late? I remove my coat and take a seat next to her. She gives me a smile and gets me a glass of water from the kitchen. I gulp it down like a thirsty beggar. She goes back to studying.

"Did you fight with vaani?" She asks, her attention on her books. That woman couldn't keep her mouth shut for once?

"I don't even wanna talk about it, kirti" I tell her.

"You don't have to, you know. She came over and started crying to me. I just felt bad. Bhai, I see you as a role model. An example of what I want in my husband. You wouldn't like if my husband shouts at me like that, would you?" She maintains eye contact with me and talks.
If he even dared to keep his voice loud with my sister, I wouldn't waste a second to crush him.

"Of course I wouldn't, kiru." My voice softens.

"Then vaani, also has a brother who cares about her just as you do to me. He wouldn't like it either if you treat her like  shit." She says. It makes sense honestly. Though kirti is 3 years smaller than me, she talks as if she's a grandma. Who knows everything. Who probably has already seen World War 1 and 2. I appreciate that. At-least someone doesn't lose their patience with me. I love her more than anything.

"I get it. I'll make it up to her tomorrow kiru. I was already in a bad mood today I couldn't help. What are you studying this late?" I change the topic.

"I got exams from next week. I'm studying about types of tumor and how to remove them" she says. Kirti is studying MBBS. She wants to be a neurologist. And I can see how much work she has put into this. I'm so proud of her.

I get up and go to the kitchen and make coffee for both of us. I give her a cup and settle next to her.

"You know doctor sahiba, you shouldn't study late. Get up early and study instead." I suggest her.

"I know bhai, I was waiting for you. I'll just finish this topic and sleep. You too, freshen up and sleep. Don't stay up" She warns me and sips her coffee. I don't disturb her anymore and go back to my room. Finishing the coffee, I just lay down on my bed. My phone beeps.

Vaani: Did you have food?

It's 2:48 am. Why is she awake so late? And why does she still care about me when I literally lashed out on her hours back? Is that how weak it makes a person who's in love? Is that how much I mean to her?

Me: I did. Sorry for today. Didn't mean to lash out. Let's go out tomorrow. 10 am. Be ready.

She deserves that at least for what I did today.

Vaani: Don't worry, it's all good. I'll be ready tomorrow. Don't be late.

Is this how insane people are when they are in love? That they care so much even if you don't care? I feel guilty. I shouldn't have gotten her hopes up. I shouldn't have gotten into this relationship. I can't even give her the love she deserves. And yet she still loves me.

But do I love her as much as to care when they don't?

Is it what I really want?

Alright, kabir. We get you. Let me know how the chapter was and leave your comments down below!
Toddles~~~