A Queens return

Pretending

As I slipped on my backpack and made my way to the door, a sense of determination washed over me, driving me forward even as doubts gnawed at the edges of my mind. I couldn't stay here, not for another moment. I needed to get out, to find a place where I could breathe freely once more.

I made my way to the door, the sound of my footsteps echoing in the silence, I could feel my mother's eyes boring into my back, her disapproval a palpable weight that hung heavy in the air. But I refused to turn around, refused to let her see the turmoil that churned within me.

Before I could reach the door, her voice cut through the silence like a knife, sharp and biting. "And just where do you think you're going, young lady?" she demanded, her tone laced with indignation.

I hesitated, my hand hovering over the doorknob, before forcing myself to turn and face her. "I'm going to school," I replied, my voice steady despite the tremor in my heart. "I can't stay here and listen to you two fight anymore."

My mother's expression darkened, her features twisted with anger. "How dare you speak to me like that?" she spat, her voice rising with each word. "You're so ungrateful, Luna. We provide for you, and this is how you repay us?"

I swallowed hard, the unjust guilt that had been simmering beneath the surface threatening to consume me. "I'm sorry, Mom," I whispered, the words tasting bitter on my tongue. "But I can't do this anymore. I need to get out."

But my mother was having none of it, her resentment boiling over into outright fury. "Leaving without even finishing your breakfast?" she scoffed, her voice dripping with disdain. "How rude can you be? You're lucky we even adopeted you and let you live under our roof."

I flinched at her words, feeling the sting of her accusation like a slap to the face. But I refused to back down, refused to let her guilt-trip me into submission. "I'm sorry," I repeated, my voice firmer this time. "But I have to go. I'll see you later."

And with that, I turned and fled, the weight of my mother's disapproval heavy on my shoulders as I stepped out into the cool morning air.

While I stepped out into the open air, the weight of my decision hanging heavy on my shoulders, I found myself enveloped by a familiar sense of unease. The crows that had been circling overhead seemed to sense my turmoil, their dark forms descending from the sky to perch on nearby branches, their beady eyes fixed on me with an eerie intensity.

I clenched my fists at my sides, frustration bubbling up inside me like a tempest threatening to break free from its confines. "Why does everything have to be so difficult?" I muttered under my breath, my voice tinged with bitterness.

The crows cawed in response, their voices a haunting echo of my own inner turmoil. It was as if they could sense the anger that simmered just beneath the surface, the primal rage of my inner wolf threatening to burst free from its cage.

I took a deep breath, willing myself to calm the storm that raged within me. But the anger refused to be tamed, bubbling up inside me like a volcano on the verge of eruption. 

"I can't do this anymore," I muttered to the birds, my voice thick with emotion. "I'm tired of pretending that everything's okay, tired of biting my tongue and swallowing my pride. They treat me like I'm nothing, like I don't matter."

The ravens cawed in response, their cries echoing my own feelings of frustration and helplessness. It was as if they understood, as if they shared in my pain and my anger.

"I hate always having to apologize," I continued, my voice growing louder with each word. "But I know that if I don't, things will only get worse. They don't listen to reason, don't care about how I feel. All they care about is their own petty squabbles."

The anger bubbled up inside me like a volcano on the verge of eruption, threatening to consume me with its fiery intensity. But I knew that I couldn't let it control me, couldn't let it dictate my actions.

"I hate feeling like this," I whispered, my voice barely more than a breath. "But I know that I have to keep it together, at least for now. School won't be easy, I know that. But I'll do whatever it takes to survive, to make something of myself despite the odds stacked against me."

The ravens cawed in agreement, their calls a chorus of encouragement as I continued on my way. For a moment, amidst the chaos and uncertainty, I felt a glimmer of hope stir within me, a spark of determination that refused to be extinguished.

After a while watching the ravens, I continued my walk to school, the ravens that had been my constant companions seemed to flock around me in greater numbers, their dark forms swirling in the air above me like a silent escort. I couldn't help but feel a sense of unease at their presence, a nagging suspicion that they were trying to tell me something.

I glanced around at the other students, noting the wary glances and hushed whispers that followed me as I passed. The sight made my stomach churn with discomfort, a reminder of just how isolated I was in this new environment.

But amidst the whispers and stares, I couldn't help but overhear fragments of conversation that sent a chill down my spine. "Did you see all those birds? It's like something out of a horror movie." "I heard they're bad luck, that they bring death wherever they go." "What's with that new girl? Is she some kind of witch?"

I clenched my jaw, forcing myself to ignore the hurtful words and the stares that followed me like a shadow. I knew I didn't belong here, that I was different from the other students in ways they couldn't begin to understand. But I refused to let their ignorance and fear dictate my actions.

Finally, I reached the secretary's office, the door looming before me like a barrier between myself and the unknown. With a deep breath, I pushed it open and stepped inside, steeling myself for whatever challenges lay ahead.

But as I made my way to the front desk, I couldn't shake the feeling that the eyes of the entire school were upon me, watching and waiting for me to slip up, to reveal the truth that lay hidden beneath the surface.

As I approached the secretary, I plastered a polite smile on my face, determined to make a good impression despite the unease that gnawed at the edges of my mind. "Excuse me," I said, my voice steady despite the turmoil within. "I'm Luna Silverfang, the new student. I'm here to pick up my schedule."