Without You

Chapter 18

Jungkook didn't speak to me at all for the past week. But it doesn't bother me anymore.

YeJun still tried to get me to hang out with him. He keeps telling me that I'll be alone again if I don't become his friend, and possibly girlfriend again. I told him I rather be alone.

Getting friends just made everything bad. If I was still alone, I'd be fine. I mean my parents got divorced but I would be happy. I could visit my mother. My dad is treating me good. My life would be great! Amazing! If I just didn't fall for Jungkook; if I didn't fall for YeJun.

It's Saturday, a weekend. I have nothing to do. For the past week, I've been stuck in my room every time I came home from school. My dad noticed and he asked if I was okay. I told him that everything's fine. That I'm probably going to not have friends again. He asked why and I told him I'll explain later, when I finally know why Jungkook is ignoring me and TaeHyung is disliking me.

I still can't get over the fact that he's ignoring me. After all we've done and been through together. After all the things I've told him, and the things he told me. After all the things he's done for me, to make sure I don't hurt myself again. He ignores me? And for what reason? I don't know. I want to know but at the same time I don't. I'm worried that it'll be something stupid like last time.

At first I thought he was ignoring me because of that kiss at the NamSan tower, but it can't be that. He was still talking to me. He just stopped  talking to me when TaeHyung came up to us and took him away. Well, not Jungkook has a girlfriend so ignoring him back myself is so easy.

Jimin's different though. He's actually still interacting with me. He's not talking to me but whenever he looks at me, and I look at him, he smiles and just walks away. Jungkook just quickly looks away and TaeHyung as always, rolls his eyes. I wonder why Jimin is kind.

My phone rings and it's from an unknown number. I let it ring for a few more seconds, debating whether I should answer it or not. I decide to answer.

"Hello? Who's this?" I say.

"Oh, so you deleted my number." the person over the phone says. "It's YeJun."

I scoff.

"Of course I deleted your number. I don't want to talk to you." I say, about to hang up.

"Wait! You seriously like the idea of being alone?" he asks me.

"Yes."

"Whatever then." he says, and hangs up. I scoff and roll my eyes, putting my phone down beside me.

I was doing fine being alone before, I can be fine being alone again. I guess I was just so in love with the idea of people actually liking me, people actually wanting to be my friend. And look where that got me. I'm alone again and heartbroken slightly. How do people with a bunch of friends deal with this? Heartbreaks? Loosing people who they thought cared about them? It's so much better being alone. Although I do kind of miss the feeling of being wanted.

I get up from my bed and go and change my clothes. I dress in something casual. I'm going to go out. I don't want to think about this anymore.

***

I'm walking around the streets of Seoul. I have no final destination. I'm just walking around. I passed by McDonalds. I was so tempted to go in and buy something, but for some reason I decided not to.

But then, I reached Starbucks and I just went straight inside. I ordered the basic caramel frap and a chocolate filled croissant. I get my order and walk upstairs to the "eating" rooms. There's like 3-4 floors in here to just eat, and use for studying and homework.