pretty brown eyes (a 3rd part to 'boyfriends ^^' but it's better grammar!!!)

chapter 15: snowy weather

"What should we name him?"
I shrug at Noah's question, looking at the messy snowman we made outside our apartment. It's not usually snowy enough in December where we live to do anything outside, but we were able to make something out of the snow. I don't remember the last time I've made a snowman—if ever. The sun is setting and the Christmas lights of houses around us are the main source of light. Oh, one more thing—that one time that I coughed up blood? It never happened again.
Parker throws a snowball at the unnamed snowman, causing it's face to break. "You should name him baller."
"The hell?" Noah yells back, trying to fix our stupid little snowman's face. I giggle.
"Y'know, I was thinking of that until Parker said it," I say sarcastically. Parker rolls his eyes and tosses the remaining snow in his hand on the ground.
"I'm going inside!" he yells.
"Good!" Noah kneels down, picking up some snow and tossing it at Parker as he walks away. Parker yelps when it hits his back and turns around, flipping us both off before running inside.
"Motherfuckers!"
Okay, calling Noah and I motherfuckers was unnecessary.
Noah rolls his eyes, looking back at me, and then the snowman, and then me.
  "Take a picture with me." Noah pulls out his phone, a new one he recently bought in November, and holds the camera out as he stands close to me. I smile, internally wishing I wore some damn gloves. He takes a picture, and then grabs my chin and kisses me. He gets a picture of that too. He puts his phone back in his pocket, and continues to kiss me, his other hand going on my face as well. I gasp for air occasionally because it was already colder and harder to breathe than usual.
  Noah finally pulls away, keeping his face close to mine. He stares at me with a smile on his face. "You're so cute."
  I laugh and shake my head, turning away. Across the street, I see two boys, highschoolers, walking down the sidewalk and holding hands. They both have on one glove, as if they're warming hands with each others' bare hands. The boy on the left has blonde hair and fair skin, and the boy on the right has dark brown hair and light brown skin. The boy on the right leans down and kisses the blonde's forehead.
  "Those two boys remind me of us." Noah grabs my hand.
  "Kind of." I squeeze Noah's hand. "Except we weren't in love in highschool."
  "We were, you just didn't acknowledge it."
  "I didn't acknowledge it?! Bullshit."
  "You sure? I think you kinda pushed me off a roof."
  "And I think you 'kinda' disappeared afterwards."
  Noah pauses after I say that.
  "And then you disappeared again," I add.
  "I'm sorry," Noah mutters, his gaze turning to the snow under our feet. And now I feel like a dick because he's sad.
  "No, no, no." I grab both of Noah's cold hands, warming them in my own. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean it in a bad way. I mean, I'm not upset.."
Hold on. Now that I think about it, I do feel a little upset. I thought he was dead for—what? Six months? And he was alive the whole time and no one told me.
I try not to focus on that aspect because right now he's here, and I'm getting better. I think I'm ready to get a job again now, soon, preferably the one I had before. Noah got a job, by the way, so now Jordan's not alone.
Anyway, I don't need to be upset because I'm getting better now, but I have to ask.. "Hold on..juusssst.. genuine question..." Noah's gaze meets mine, and it makes me hesitate longer seeing those regretful eyes. "Why did it take so long? I'm just curious. Couldn't someone have, like, called me? Any way to inform me my boyfriend is alive?"
"I.. um.. I-I.." Noah stammers, completely out of character for him. "Uh.. er.. um.. hah, I, uh.. I kinda.. um.. erm..."
I stare around Noah with a look of concern and confusion. "Are you okay?" I ask, my voice quiet and laced with urgent worry. He's never as anxious as he is right now—he's avoiding eye contact, he's stuttering, and his hands are trembling. I watch him take a deep breath to steady himself.
"It.." Noah shakes his head. He pulls my hands away and I feel my heart skip a beat. A bad beat. "It's getting cold."
I sigh and watch as Noah walks away, feeling aomething I'd felt towards him very long ago; confusion and fear.
"My love?" Noah holds the door open, smiling at me and waiting for me to come with. All my concern fades away at that smile I love so much and I nod, walking inside after him.
"You two are crazy," Jordan says as we walk in, "I hate snow."
I kick the snow off my shoes and take off my coat as Noah takes off his hat.
"We made a snowman, y'know. His names baller," Noah remarks like some jokester genius. I giggle calling him a genius because he really is smart. Jokester genius. That's a funny word.
"Baller?"
"I dunno, Parker suggested it."
"You listened to him?"
"I wanted him to shut up."
They have the most stupid back-and-forth conversations. I roll my eyes and sit onto the couch. Once I pat the seat next to me, Noah sits there immediately.
"I ordered food," Jordan adds. "And now I gotta go piss."
Noah and I exchange glances, giggling as Jordan walks away. Noah puts his hand on my thigh, whispering, "You've got a weird sister."
"And you've got a weird brother." I rest my head on his shoulder, letting his hand move up my thigh. He laughs faintly at me and kisses the top of my head.
"I'm sorry for being so awkward earlier," he whispers.
"Don't be. I understand if it's complicated to explain, or if you're uncomfortable. I'm not upset or any.."
"But you should be. I'm l—I.. I-I left you without telling you I was still alive."
"Why should I be upset about that now?" I ask, putting my hand on top of Noah's. "I'm healing now. I know if you could've, you would've told me sooner."
Noah smiles at me, but I can see regret and guilt still hiding behind those pretty brown eyes. I plant a small kiss on his lips and whisper, "I love you."
"I love you too," Noah whispers back, squeezing my hand. I lay my head back on his shoulder, staying as close as possible because I'm cold.
  As we're laying there, I get this random thought. "Hey, where does Parker go when he leaves?"
  "He doesn't leave. He made a little bedroom in that walk-in closet no one uses. You didn't know that? He's got a little matress in there and LED lights he found everything."
"Oh. Where'd he get a matress and LED lights??"
"Don't ask me, dude."
"...Um, alright."