pretty brown eyes (a 3rd part to 'boyfriends ^^' but it's better grammar!!!)

chapter 12: point of view

  This has been getting boring, am I right or am I right? How about we mix up the point of view for a change, and get a small glimpse of another friend of ours?

  I just helped Jayden through a panic attack.
  It was pretty easy. I've delt with them before, and I just know him. Yeah, I had my other ways, but they're not important.
I love Jayden. I've loved him since I met him. Let's not get into the whole 'love at first sight' thing. I don't believe in that. I do, though, believe that love doesn't take long to develop. I had a crush on that boy the second he had to brush that soft hair out of his cute green eyes. Oh, that was when he bumped into me in the hallway. Classic romantic story starter.
I couldn't look at this boy with anything other than admiration. He's adorable. I love him.
  He's perfect. I could go on a rant about him for hours. I could write an essay on him. The way he talks, the way he looks at me, the way his eyes glow in the light, how soft his lips are, how sweet he is even if he tries to act the opposite, his cute style of clothes, his long eyelashes that make him so pretty, his light brown/tan skin with little freckles on his nose, his brown hair with those cute blonde highlights, the way that when he's nervous he'll play with his hands and twirl his thumbs, the way he'll just listen to me as long as I use the right words (which is almost about any words as long as I say them,) everything about him.
And now my baby is in my arms, hugging me like I'm gonna die for real if he lets go. He's laying on my lap—he loves it there, I know—with his arms around my neck. I carried him to our bedroom because he's very light. I kiss his forehead, and he finally looks up at me; first time he's made eye contact this entire time.
"It's late," I whisper. Shit, I'm a sucker for those little puppy eyes he gives me when he looks up at me. He nods.
"I'm sorry for making it later."
That doesn't even make sense. "You don't need to be sorry for needing some comfort." He giggles, making me smile. "Are you feeling better?"
He nods. "I'm tired."
"That's normal after panic attacks. Y'know, some people even pass out after having them. Or throw up."
"It's also normal to be tired at twelve in the morning," Jayden adds. I chuckle.
  "Well, then," I kiss Jayden's forehead, "you can always go to bed. Do you feel nauseous?"
  "No. I did, but not anymore."
  "Good. I love you."
  "I love you too," Jayden mumbles. "I'm sorry for panicking."
  "Jayden, baby." I rub his back slightly as if he's a little kid. "It's not your fault. I've dealt with panic attacks before, I've seen others have them. It's not your fault. I know how they feel."
  I can just tell Jayden is smiling, even if his face is buried into me. I kiss the top of his head again, my hand in his soft hair. My fingers trace out the blonde strands of his hair, gently twirling them. He must've found it soothing, because not long later he's asleep.
  He's so sweet. He always tries to deny it, but he really is.
Yknow, I wish I wasn't gone for so long. It affected him so much. Being stuck in your own head while trying to heal sucks. Wait, so a coma.
Shit, I can't say shit like that.
I get this little voice in my head when he's asleep, telling me I'm making a mistake. I am. But he will never know I am. I will never tell him.
And if that fuck of a brother tells him anything, I won't hesitate to act on that threat.