3.Bright - Waiting

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Bright

It was scary but i try to look calm. I dont want phi pha and phi beam felt guilty.  Are you okay baby, phi pha ask me slowly. I nod and smile to him. I will kill forth when he come back he Said coldly. I just smile. I know how he feel right now. I just let him release his anger because he is waiting for phi forth as much as i do. We help each other to get through all of this. I am lucky phi pha is willing to protect and love me. I know he love phi forth so much. You should be here, I heard phi beam yelling at his boyfriend, phi ming. Normally he will be with us but he have urgent matter so he cant be with us tonight. When he with us, we will look a bit stronger. When its only me, phi pha and phi beam, no matter how hard we try to be cold , we look weak,  we dont have that scary aura. All of us look manly and strong if we are with normal people, but in dark world, even we try hard we really cant supressing the dark aura among other groups.  We are still here because they afraid of my phi name and phi ming. After three years, they start to get suspicious and become more brave. Today they try to harass phi beam. He is the cutest among us but, he is not someone they can treat as a girl. He is strong and brave.  Both phi pha and phi beam are holding themselves because of me. I am the weakest here. Now I felt angry because phi forth never teach me to protect my self. He let me live like normal student. I dont need to do anything because he is protecting me.
I try my best to learn but 3 years are not enough. Imagine, I am the boss of mafia group but I cant even protect myself. I am still alive  because of my phi man, who are willing to protect me even they don't know wether phi forth will come back or not. So how can I leave them, when they love my phi so much.
Thank god that bastard was there today, phi beam said.  Do you know him phi, I ask phi beam. Listen bright, dont get involve with him. He is very scary and ruthless. It's better we don't come across each other phi beam reply clear and firm. I quickly nod. Is he that scary, I ask myself.  Listen to phi beam, dont you see how the hooligans run for their life when he just stand there, phi pha said to me. Again I just nod. I know both of them always  wish the best for me , so I will listen to them. It just I felt he is different from what they said.

Since I can't visit my orphanage which I use to stay long time ago on my birthday,  I choose to visit them today. I bring so much present for the kids and my mother. I need to be here so I can continue to live.  I need to look at the angels face and mother so I can keep moving foward.  I lost my willing to live because of my brother. I am alone in this big world. I still remember how my phi beg mother to not let me adopted to anyone.  He promise he will take me back and he did. He work hard and never forget to visit me at least once a week until he is 18 years old. But he still put me under mother care if he need to do some mission or out station.  That why, until today I treat this orphanage as my home. 

Wait, I said before I undress. We cant phi, one of the angels hold my hand. Dont worry I said. No, if we go into the water, they will close this door the kids said worrily.  They are right,  kids can't go to water without adult supervision,  but phi are adult so it will be okay I said and quickly run to the water. I quickly grab the ball and swim to the seaside. 
Who are talking to the kids. I need to hurry, normally no one will be here.  Who is he, I ask the kids and look at someone who run at the beach.  The big house owner, the kids said. I look at the big house or we can call it palace. I used to dream that I can see the house but mother firmly remind us to stay at our house or the beach only. She will really angry if any of us go close to the big house. Since its only us here, I continue playing football with my short only. The kids make fun of me because of my white legs. I used to them call me snow white. It a very happy and fun day until I was hit by someone. I immedietely fell down after that crush. I look behind my back and what I see really frightening.  I quickly get up and push the kids behind my back. Everyone was so scare and no one dare to talk.  I just look into his eyes and pray hardly that he will just walk away. Thank god, he just walk thru and before all if us release our breath he coldly said, Wear your shirt and continue his run.  The angels quickly run and give me my shirt.  I dont know why but I quickly wear my shirt and bring the kids back into our house. I felt worry and scare at the same time. Lets go, I said.

It was a fun day, we celebrate my birthday here. Its just humble meal and celebration, but I felt content and grateful. So when phi pha pick me up later at night, I felt a bit reluctant but I promise to the angels that I will come back again soon. I have to go. I  need to help phi pha and phi beam. We have some issue. I wish I only can stay here waiting for my phi like I used to be.

Thank you for reading❤️
29.02.24

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