Obey Me Head Cannons and Scenarios [Kinda sorta on break?]

Assigning Obey Me Characters To Me and My Friends' Quotes

*Me and one of my friends talking about my handwriting, my other two friends talking about one of my friend's crushes* 

Friend 3 - "It's so small!"

                                                - Asmodeus

*Me and my friends talking about random crap during English*

Friend 3 - "I like pizza"

Friend 1 - "What does that have anything to do with our conversation friend 3..."

Friend 3 - "Shut up i'm hungry"

                                                        - Beelzebub and Satan

Friend 1 - "HE WAS OBSESSED WITH DIRTY DANCING"

Me - "Excuse me..."

Friend 1 - "E.E Cummings was obsessed with dirty dancing."

Me - "Damn, me too"

Friend 2 - "EMBRY"

Me - "WHAT!"

                          - Asmodeus, Lucifer, and Satan

Me - "Yo, friend 1, what's long, hard, and has 'cum' in the middle?"

Friend 1 - "A PENIS"

Me - "NO DUMBASS A CUCUMBER"

                                                            - Beelzebub and Asmodeus

Friend 3 - "If I was a squid, what would you three do?"

Friend 1 - "Pee on you."

Friend 3 - "Excuse me?"

                                            - Leviathan and Mammon

Friend 1 - "I'm going to kill myself."

Friend 3 - "You're not allowed to do that!"

Friend 1 - "Why not!?"

Me - "Because this is a christian minecraft server, dying isn't allowed."

Friend 3 - "...You're not even religious"

                                                                        - Belphegor, Simeon, and Solomon

*I pull out a book from the bookshelf by our desks*

Me - "Look, it's Bella Swan and Justin Beiber!"

Friend 1 - "STOP SAYING THAT EM"

Me - "No."

                                                                  - Solomon and Simeon

*Me and friend 2 just talking*

Friend 1 - "If I could smash you into oblivion, I would."

Me - "Who was that targeted to exactly...?"

Friend 1 - "You, idiot"

Friend 2 - "Damn, getting threatened and being called an idiot, double homicide"

                                                             - Solomon, Barbatos, and Belphegor

Me - "I'm the manliest man that's ever manned!"

Friend 3 - "But aren't you a girl?"

Me - "LET ME DREAM"

Friend 1 - "You don't wanna be dream, he's a pedophile"

Me - "Friend 1...shut up..." 

                                                         - Mc, Mammon, and Leviathan

Friend 1 - "Dude, this man looks like a pedophile"

Me - "Like my uncle!"

Friend 2 - "I'm about to throw you into China."

                                                         - Asmodeus, Mc, and Solomon

*Friend 2 smacks friend 1*

Me - "Smacking them won't do you any good, they're a Masochist"

Friend 1 - "I'M NOT A MASOCHIST YOU CREEP"

                                                         - Mc (as friend 2), Asmodeus, and Mammon

Friend 2 - "If I could have a piece of lint for everytime Em made a trauma joke, I'd be rich with lint"

Me - "I thought it was 'if I could have a penny for everytime so and so said such n such, I'd be rich"

Friend 3 - "Nah, pennies are now called lint "

                                                             - Mammon, Mc, and Belphegor

Friend 1 - "I wanna kill myself right now"

Me - "Same"

Friend 1 - "I'm being serious you autistic homosexual"

Me - "....Damn L"

Friend 1 - "I'm going to dropkick you"

                                                          - Mammon and Leviathan

Friend 3 - "You know what I want right now?"

Me - "The sweet release of an orga--"

Friend 3 - "I WAS GOING TO SAY WHAT WE HAD FOR LUNCH"

Me - "Oh...you should've gotten lunch then"

                                                             - Beelzebub and Asmodeus

Friend 2 - "If everybody is technically related...doesn't that mean everybody is a little black?"

Friend 3 - "That's not how life works..."

Friend 1 - "I HAVE THE N WORD PASS THEN"

Me - "FRIEND 1 NO!"

                                             - Mammon, Satan, Leviathan, and Lucifer

Me - "If we were all in heartstopper, who would we all be?"

Friend 3 - "I'm just gonna see myself out"

Me - "You uncultered swine..."

                                                                - Leviathan and Mammon

________________________________________________________________________________

Call me and my friends cringe all you want, we call ourselves that all the time. Anyway, if you have any out of context quotes you'd like to share in the comments, do it. I'd love to hear em c:!

Anyways, I'm gonna sign off here for the day! I might make another chapter and post it today, but no promises!

Reminder; Stay strong, stay healthy, stay proud of yourself, and be the best you that you can be <3

                  - Embry signing out!