"Implausible Possibility" BTS Fiction story 💜

Chapter 12 💜 Pouring my heart

He started driving and I was clueless what to do,  was I supposed to move my hands,  my mouth,  or can I breathe??

Shit!! This exact moment I wanted to kill Namjoon for telling him he is my bias too, I could literally not feel my ass on the seat,  I was becoming numb slowly. 

Yoongi just looked at me and said "you can breathe Sherry" .

I smiled all of a sudden.  Hiding my face .. turning my head a little,  I dared to ask him "you... do know I am almost a decade elder to you right?"

He let out a sharp short breath looking at side and gave a look before saying " and does that matter to you?" "Do you want me to call you Noona ??"

I was looking at him,  he was driving and looking straight. 
I remained silent. 

He then spoke " to me,  it doesn't matter how old a person is , or how short,  fat, thin, or what is his/her nationality is,  what matters the most is the feelings,  honesty and fighting spirits they possess."

" I really wanted to meet you,  What made you scared last night,  why'd you crumbled down crying almost fainted, why?"

I was startled , I tried to remember the incidents , it came blurry,  but they did and  I froze.

I felt so embarrassed that I couldn't look up,  I started getting nervous and shaking a little. 

Yoongi noticed and he got concerned,  and in a rush to meet him,  I forgot my medicines and there was no water in the car..

Before I started feeling breathless and choked up , I quickly took out my cell.. and started typing "...

"panick attack..." "pull over for medicines and water"

Yoongi slowed down and pulled up aside and saw the text.

The first thing,  he realised he needs to take quick action.

He snatched and held my one hand in his hands,  grabbed them tightly and with the other started driving,  frantically looking for a medicine store and water...

He asked me to open the window for some fresh air and the other to concentrate on him for breathing technique ..

He found a shop in about 5 min and pulled over,  before getting down he asked me the name of the medicine,  somehow I told him with little difficulty..

He looked so bad as if he was criticising himself for asking a personal question,  but then it wasn't his fault.  He was only curious ..

I showed him the prescription and he grabbed my phone quickly to turn around to get the medicine and water.. he looked at me and almost crying begged me to stay with him..

I had to keep his words,  I was panting,  falling short of breathes , my eyes started seeing the black dots,  but I wanted to hold back.. wanted to keep his words..

He rushed with the medicines and water,  hurriedly looked at me and patted my cheeks to open my mouth.

I was almost unconscious, I could hear his muffled sound,  as if it was coming from a well.

It was all dark and his sounds were coming from far far away.. I did not had the energy to respond..

He splashed some water on my face to bring me back.. I was startled with the cold water and responded for few sec.

He did not waste time to put the pills and water and made sure it went down my throat , he patted my back with one hand and held my head from the other , putting my head on his chest.. as soon as his heartbeats hit my ears,  I was reminded of a similar sound,  similar sound which calmed me some hours ago,  the sound brought back yesterday's happening..

I was slowly coming back to my normal state  I did not had the energy to pull away from him, but I was hell embarrassed,  I mean come on.. again and again... why is this happening.. never wanted Yoongi to think like this about me.. why God ??

We were like that for about 5 min when I regained some consciousness and energy too..

I raised my hands towards his back and patted him a little to let him know I am doing OK. 

He parted yet took my face in both of his hands,  where I could feel his thumbs across both my cheeks , caressing them and taking a good look at me.. as soon as our eyes met, my eyes filled up again..

I was so embarrassed to even look at him anymore.. I just quickly looked down and said..

" I am sorry, please forgive me, I did not mean to trouble you,  I just did not know this would happen,  its been sometime these symptoms were dormant". I was still looking down..

He did not say anything.. just made sure I am sitting properly and my seat belt was in place .. quickly came to the other side and started driving. 

He looked at me couple of times and saw me still looking down.. he just said " I wasn't troubled but yes I was scared,  for you,  I mean I won't ask you anything now,  I can see its something very difficult for you to talk about,  I don't want to upset you anymore".

I just looked at him once and our eyes met.. I gave a silent nod, as if thanking him for this.. a million times. 

He drove ahead but did not speak anything. 

We reached a small café on the way and he thought it would be best to eat there,  or we'll not get anything further on the route. 

We sat and ordered the food. We ate in silence,  I could see him looking at me with concern. 

I wanted to split the bill , but he was authoritative and did not let me.. I couldn't say anything..

I sat in the car thinking he'd offer me to drop home, instead I heard him tell Joonie that I was with him and that we were reaching in couple of hours ..

I looked at him surprisingly.. he just looked at me with a slight curve. Not even bothering to explain,  as if he knew I ain't gonna protest to what he already decided. 

I was nervous but I decided to speak..

I asked him " what do you want to know, I am OK to talk about it, I am fine now."

He looked at me and replied" it's ok if you don't want to, knowing that you'd already overcome what was so painful is in itself a very big thing, you can choose not to speak about it."

"He was dishonest , not loyal,  and abusive : mentally,  emotionally... and after a pause I said.. and physically..."

I saw Yoongi clutching the wheels hard,  and pressing his lips but his expressions were quiet serious. 

He did not say anything,  I continued..

"It took me 15 long years to finally come out of it.. there were so many things going on simultaneously that if I sit on and count them,  probably I'd miss tomorrow's concert as well.." 

"What happened was very unfortunate,  something which I never expected to bear , just for loving someone unconditionally..

I forgot to make boundaries... the boundaries which could have protected me from getting abused.. from getting broken and beaten multiple times.
For not making them when my daughter was growing up seeing all that shit ..."

I started choking and suddenly I felt a comforting hand on my hands.. he just said "stop".

"And that's why the medicines?" I nodded,  I told him , I stopped them for sometime now,  since I am feeling OK and after becoming an army it was rare.. rare for those memories to haunt me back... but I am sorry it happened yesterday,  and I am sorry for what happened today..

He took a pause and said...
"Let's just talk about me now" He said all of a sudden and I looked at him with confused expressions ..

He asked me..."Tell me something as an army that I don't know".

I just realised he wants my miserable mood to lighten up , probably scared I will fall sick again..

I nodded and blushed a lil .. I asked him what all he knows first..

His answers surprised me !!