Thief With A Bike ~ Krii7y

~~~ { 9 } ~~~

"No you don't. You shouldn't have to worry about me." Smii7y also quietly added, "no one worried before." Obviously it wasn't meant for John to hear, but he did anyway.

"Are you... okay?" John asked softly, knowing the answer he was going to get wasn't honest.

"Yeah. Sorry." Smii7y sighed.

"Smit, be honest please." John inquired.

Smit sucked in a breath, shaking his head. "I'm trying John, you know I'm trying-." Smii7y's voice was shaky, and before he could finish, John dragged him off the bike with him, and pulled him into a hug.

He slowly hugged back, and buried his face into John's chest.

"I wish I could go back to the military, people didn't judge there, and it wasn't hard to get to know people because we're all the same there." Smii7y seemed to be refusing to let himself cry, and you could hear it in his voice. He'd probably been told to 'man up' enough times in his life to fight it automatically.

"People trying to get away." Smii7y finished his statement.

"You know-." Smii7y suddenly continued, his voice a higher pitch then before. "When I was younger, no one wanted me. I looked too strange for their normal family. The only people who wanted me were abusive, somehow I just never had luck on my side." Smii7y finally started to spill, unable to hold it now. John knew to just stay silent.

His voice suddenly got quiet. "Kids would hit me on the play ground when I was only 7. They said I was a monster, and I think their right. My second year of high school I just couldn't take the laughs anymore, and was seriously contemplating suicide. John I'm a fucking mess. I wish I could go back to the day I was born, and start it all over. As a different person, in a different body." Smii7y took a deep breath, trying to calm himself, but it was futile. 

"I kept all that wrapped up in a ugly little bundle, but as soon as you said you weren't going to leave me, it all unraveled." John had never seen anyone have such a calm breakdown.

 "I pulled some strings, and got into the military without an ID, and life started to look up for me... but then Puffers gang found me and used me as a fucking sex doll."  Smii7y was fuming at that part, and grabbed onto John as he said it. "I trusted that asshat, and he acts like nothing happened!" John could hear Smit's small sobs. "The last thing he said to me before that happened John, was 'I'll never leave you.'" 

It all clicked. How had John not noticed that? How would he had known it was going to trigger him though.

"They discharged me on the grounds of trauma, what a fucking joke." He said between sobs. "Those gangs are terrible, John. They would always call me 'pretty demon' and if I could kill every single one of those son of a bitches I would." Now, John had never had anyone confess they wanted to kill someone to him, but this was probably a spur of the moment case.

John had never seen Smit act like this, and he probably only was because John accidentally triggered him.

After Smii7y calmed down a little he said. "At least I had always loved biking, so I had a second career." John patted his back reassuringly, and said nothing, just embraced him.

"I loved Puffer you know." Smii7y continued. "He was a good guy when I first met him. He wasn't involved in all that bullshit yet, and he was my best friend. I trusted him." Smii7y then, and only then, fully, and uncontrollably broke down. "Don't do that to me John! Please don't do that to me!"

John's heart was stricken as Smii7y uncontrollably sobbed into his helmet, which was pressed to Johns chest. Smii7y was holding onto John for dear life, almost like if he let go of him, he'd be gone forever.

No wonder why Smit was so hesitant sometimes. He's scared. He's scared to trust people because his trust has been broken so many times. So many homes with the promise of good people, only for them to beat and torture him. So many friends he trusted, who did shit to him behind his back. Kids, teens, and adults all looked down on him, and so he looks down on everyone else. That's how he was taught.

Constant rape, abuse, violence, and death was carved into Smit's brain with a hammer and chisel. He didn't talk about himself much, because he was afraid to reveal to much, and make him a target. He's afraid, and it hit John like a dump truck.

John now suddenly loathed Puffer. How could you do that? Some people are truly evil.

"I could never do that to you Smit. I'm so sorry. Please don't think I'd ever do that. That's a crime that's truly evil, and I don't think I can even stomach what you told me. I'm so, so sorry for triggering you." John May be a thief, but he couldn't think of ever harming Smit. Ever.

John squeezed Smii7y, and he only choked out a small 'please don't, John.'  Between sobs. Johns heart was aching

John knew a lot about Smit, but he had never expected rape. Frankly, John didn't know quite a few key points about Smit, but he knew most of it.

Now he hoped he knew it all. No more secrets.

Smit will know Johns secrets soon too.