The Letter You Didn't Receive

chapter eight

Colette looked at her boyfriend with admirable eyes as he drove. Before, she used to be awkward inside his car but now she sat in comfort. Her heart throbbing the same way but this time with love.

"You're staring again Cole," he smirked before looking back at her for a second.

"Sorry I'm just amazed at your...ear," she faked. Pierce scoffed and laughed along.

"Haha, very funny," he retorted. Colette looked away, biting her lip trying to contain any more laughter from coming out.

"Where are we going?" Colette asked him.

"Ever heard of Rainier Lake?"

"No." Rainier Lake was far west from where Richmond was located. It was two hours away. The couple had brought a picnic basket filled with all sorts of food—some that they made together. They brought a small cooler of drinks and a blanket to sit on.

When they arrived they were greeted by a warm breeze and the reflection of a wide area of water—glistening all sorts of secrets and mysteries in the name of love.

Colette gawked at the scenery. The sky was beautifully clear. Her eyes reached the vibrant grassland which seemed freshly cut and clean.

They placed Colette's pink gingham blanket on the grass then the rest of the stuff they brought and finally laid flat. Pierce's arm wrapped around Colette's shoulder while she rested her arm on his chest and softly tapped her fingers making Pierce's heart flutter. There would be no doubt that she could feel his heartbeat pounding. She rested her head gently on him and calmly breathed in and out.

Pierce twirled himself to face Colette who giggled bubbly, her hands covering her reddened cheeks.

After he tucked some strands of her hair behind her ear, he trailed his fingers down to her cheek then to her jawline and caressed her slowly with his thumb. He stared into her eyes and found himself wanting to melt into them. Those dark chocolate eyes filled with a hidden experience. Something he would never know. He had always wondered when he'd ever meet Colette's family but could care less if she wanted him to meet them or not. He was sure she had her reasons. Still, he was curious.

"You never talk about yourself sometimes," he deeply said to the point where it hit Colette's realization as well.

"Oh uh..." but she lost her train of thought.

"Am I ever going to meet the people that took care of my lovely girlfriend?" he assumed. Colette stared at his chest trying to think about an answer but how could she tell him that her mother died and her father was an abuser? He would probably report Mr. Anderson and then she'd have to get taken away to a foster care system and never see the life she created anymore, the life that she calls home. But at the same time, she wanted to tell him so badly. She wanted him to know the way her dad treats her. She wanted him to know. But it would be embarrassing and she'd feel guilty to bring such a problem to Pierce. He'd been through enough so why would she want to put him in a situation where he could suffer tremendously? She doesn't even know if she has any family from her mom's side and she knew she couldn't trust her dad's side. They never met her but she's heard of them before—her dad's brother who was an ex-convict that ended up back at his parent's place.

"One day. I hope you especially meet my mom." Pierce eyed her carefully.

"Where is she?" He had always dropped Colette off to her house late at night, normally in such a dark house. He never once saw any light coming out but instead, coming in. As Colette always walked inside, she was the one who always turned on all the lights and he made sure of it. He found it odd how free she was during most of the day as they had been spending their days together, especially with their friends. He assumed that her parents were never home and didn't have time to tend to anything related to Colette. He assumed that they were probably busy or strict. He also assumed that they didn't know about him. If that was the case, he was alright with it. The only moment he ever had a glimpse of her family was her dad, which is the day he met Colette.

Colette felt her gaze drop away from him and she swallowed hard.

"She's here in my heart but she passed away a few years ago." Pierce blanked out. He didn't expect her to say such a thing and he suddenly felt guilty.

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Colette sent him a small smile.

"My mom passed away too. We're in the same boat." He rubbed the back of her shoulder gently.

"Is that why you live with Grandma Angel?" and he nodded his head.

"You're lucky to have her then. I'm sure she loves you the way your mother would too." Pierce stopped rubbing her and finally pulled her into him, kissing her.

They ate their homemade bento boxes, sipped on their coca colas, ate a large bag of potato chips, and had a pack of sour gummy worms.

"Isn't it crazy how we used to be so awkward around each other?" Colette asked as her back leaned against Pierce's chest.

"It is," he whispered to her ear, holding her close making sure not to let go. His voice sent tingles down her neck, to her collarbone, and then to her neck. Colette looked up to his face and he pelted a small kiss on her forehead which made her giggle.

I don't want this to end—I don't want to let her go.

"So did you finish reading Beloved?" Pierce grinned at Colette's question.

"Yes and I appreciated it." Colette felt herself shift to excitement and congratulatory but what if he actually didn't? But before she could ask further questions to try and test him, he spoke.

"It made me realize about motherhood, especially how my mom had to sacrifice her life to give me life. She probably didn't think she would die though but I know she was brave. Grandma told me so."

"Your mom is a superhero. A God if you want. She was strong enough for you and that shows how much she loved you already."

"Or she just wanted me to be out," laughed Pierce and Colette rolled her eyes with a smile and swatted his arm.

"Well no shit, childbirth is crazy. People describe it as a beautiful moment or a terrifying one but that's besides the point. The point is your mother died loving you to the very end even if it meant sacrificing herself. That's how motherhood enriches life." Pierce kissed her cheek gently and squeezed her tightly.

"Do you ever want to become a mom one day?" he asked her quietly. The environment froze. It was silent. The trees stopped rustling as the wind stopped blowing. The lake stopped thrusting small waves and the bugs stopped singing. All were waiting for her response.

"Maybe. But I want to be a dog mom first. Adopt dogs in a shelter, probably just two and then I'll have a human baby or babies," she smiled just thinking about it.

"What type of dogs?"

"Anything really. All dogs deserve a shelter of love. I love each and every one of them."

"Can we name one guitar?" Colette stared at him with the are-you-serious face and he grinned.

"That's an awful name- look I get that you love guitars but-"

"Please?" he whimpered, his arms beginning to drop from holding her.

"If you drop your arms then it's a no."

He quickly tightened his arms around her again.

Never let go.