22 November 2023🥀
“I’ve been thinking about a certain phrase a lot lately,” Dominique says, walking alongside me as we make our way to school.
“That phrase that says: Everything happens for a reason. Like by everything does it mean everything, everything or just some things.”
I shrug, not really having an answer to his question. Although I feign disinterest in the topic I can't help but think about everything that's happened to me.
Everything from the very first time I experienced real heartbreak after hearing the news about my grandmother's death.
Everything about that day my mother left for the first time promising to come back and to keep in touch.
Everything from how Mkhulu and I tried to get our lives back together, picking up the pieces and placing them together even though we knew that there'd still be a gaping hole when we were done.
Everything from the calls my mother and I had with each other and the excuses she made and how she always wanted me to understand why she couldn't be there.
Everything about Dominique and how he tricked me into learning incorrect Afrikaans which led me to fail which later led us to becoming friends.
Everything about Olivia and how she sat beside me on that day in school suddenly having hiccups when I was really short tempered and how that led to me locking eyes with her.
Everything from how surprising my mother's return was and how she barely lasted a week leaving me with new wounds to heal from before the old ones could get any type of relief.
All these things…
Could there be a reason for every single one of them?
People always talk about how one day we're gonna have to stand before God and give an account of everything we've done, good or bad.
I wonder…
I wonder if after that God would give us relief from life long pain and suffering and give us the reasons why all these things had to happen.
“I really don't know Dominique.”
He nods,his gaze flicking to me for a moment. “ I don't think it's completely true.”
“...”
“ Think about it Leo. Everything happens for a reason.If someone told me that when I was younger I'd psychoanalyze everything about my life. I'd think about every detail that probably doesn't matter and wonder what the reason for it would be.I think that's how people go crazy.”
“...Where is all this thinking coming from?”
Dominique chuckles, running his fingers through his curly brown hair.
“Would you be mad if I said it's because of you.”
“...”
“Well not you— you but all that's happened with your mom.It just got me thinking.”
“...”
“I just wish I could buy you a better mom or something.”
He chuckles,not meeting my gaze. The laughter dies too fast and his jaw tightens.
“I just don't understand the reason for it all.”
I'm shocked by his words as the silence settles over us. We're closer to school but we're far from unpacking this conversation.
YOU ARE READING
36 Questions to Fall in Love...in 36 days!
Romance" Olivia, I liked you from the moment you hiccuped your way into my life. It's funny really but it's the truth. I also wasted a lot of time and this is me trying to fix things. I'm asking you to give me 36 days to show my love for you and for you to...
