Supernova [On Hiatus]

TWENTY-TWO

TWENTY-TWO

We had an extended weekend coming up for some teacher's holiday thing.

I was ecstatic to have a break from all the thinking I'd been doing. Between my classes and Jameson and the latest and greatest Trevor drama back home, I was exhausted. Mom was begging me to come home for the break. It was only four days, not worth driving all the way home and back, but I was considering it.

Mac was going back. Her parents insisted she return for every holiday and break because they were the ones paying for the education, so they should have a say in what she does in her free time? I didn't get it.

My attendance was based purely off of scholarships and my own hard work, so I didn't give much of a shit if my mom wanted me back or not. I wasn't too keen on seeing her anymore. Texas was my new life, one that accepted me and didn't ask questions.

After I officially came out, Momma and I's relationship became more and more strained. Even after having Jameson spend the night and explaining to her that no, he wasn't just a friend and no, it wasn't just a phase and no, it wasn't because I didn't have a strong father figure growing up. She just didn't understand it, how I could possibly be more attracted to men than women, or why I suddenly liked wearing tighter clothes and experimenting with nail polish.

We'd argue about it. Always quietly and while the kids were sleeping. She would cry and say she failed me, and I'd hold her and assure her she didn't, she did the opposite, she raised me to be the best person I could be, regardless of who I liked to bed.

But she still loved me, or so she said. She'd still support me. She would stand up for me when the ladies at the bank would make comments. She would put the pride flag sticker on her Facebook profile picture. She would do her best to wrap her head around it, even though it'd been three years since I told her and it really wasn't a difficult concept.

It didn't matter.

All I knew was that there was somebody in my life, a (gasp!) man, that made me giddy on car rides and laugh when I was down and liked to kiss as much as I did. That's all that should have mattered.

"I'm not going back there," Dylan muttered, stirring his SpaghettiOs around in his bowl. "My parents can count on me turning up for Thanksgiving and Christmas and that's it."

I capped my highlighter and read over the passage one last time before slamming it shut. "I don't really wanna go either, but I miss the kids," I said honestly.

Jameson looked at me with a nervous look in his eye. "I think you should stay," he said without context. He couldn't exactly say in front of Dylan the reason for it.

Dylan didn't bat an eye, just ate around the meatballs in silence. I felt bad that he didn't have anyone to go back to Edgewood for, but I was glad he got away from that situation. He was unhappy there, everyone knew it.

"I'll come with you if you go," Jameson continued. We hadn't discussed it, mostly because I hadn't really thought about it. As far as I was concerned, I didn't have any dire reasons to get back so soon. I was just home for Christmas, only a month ago.

I shrugged, not really keen on it. "Let me think about it."

It'd been a few weeks since my big screw up. From the outside, you probably couldn't tell anything was wrong. Jameson and I were closer than we'd ever been and I was on cloud nine. I was admittedly kind of obsessed with him, everything about him.

The way he only had about three outfits but always looked spectacular. Or the way he wouldn't let me go to class or to the store without a goodbye kiss. The way he seemed to almost worship my legs, obsessed with my thighs. Even when he seemed stressed by whatever was going on with the Hernandezes (he would never tell me what he was doing) (he wanted to shelter me, or something) he refused to give me the cold shoulder again.