How to Survive a Supervillain Attack

Wednesday, March 11: Confrontation

I say "walk", but when my customers first arrive, I mistake them for a herd of stampeding elephants, especially when one of the locks on my door breaks off when they come in.

I stand up indigently, the words, "You are going to have to pay for that," on my lips. Then I realize who I am about to reproach. I go pale. I can't seem to stop my eyes from straying over to the news to confirm the nightmare I am now faced with.

Surely, this can't be happening.

Surely I am dreaming.

My eyes find the most recent news headline.

"Gladiators Seen Near Security Saver HQ before Cameras Black Out."

I slowly look back up at the five people currently in my store. I clench my hands, so they can stop shaking. The noodles I had just consumed roll around in my stomach.

"Oh, hi there!" It's Ani. Talking to me. ME. Oh, this is not good. "Sorry for barging in. Yours was the only store open. We'll be out of your hair in a few minutes. We're just..." He trails off. I finally get a good look at their condition. They look tired. It occurs to me that they've been fighting all day, non-stop. That they can even stand is a miracle. "... browsing," he continues, trying to cover his exhaustion with a smile.

"Right," I say lamely. "Browsing." I realize I am still standing and abruptly plop back down in my seat. "Ask me if you need anything," I continue, wishing my mouth would shut up already.

"Hey, I recognize this place." Lucifugus, sitting down and out of breath, still finds the energy to make unnecessary comments. "This is Scriptor's, right?" I nod my head, not wanting to give my mouth another chance to run itself into trouble.

If a hero is in a fight, don't try to have a conversation with them. They are celebrities, but they also have a world-saving job to do.

But... they do look pretty beat. Maybe I should give them moral support.

Support your local heroes (No, not during a fight.) (Unless the hero looks like they are giving up). Make posters, convince naysayers, tell the police of any suspicious activities, and just generally be positive: the heroes shouldn't have to carry all of the hope.

"Remember that book I annotated?" Lucifugus stretches a tired smile across his face. "I can't believe how crazy people went over it."

Electronica laughs. "Right. Didn't it go up for auction?"

"Yeah. It sold for some absurd amount. Gosh, I can't remember how much..."

"One million dollars." The heroes turn to me, and I feel a blush creeping over my neck. Wow, that was stupid of me. "I only know because it's the reason I decided to apply here. Broke college students like me kill to get that sort of money."

"Hopefully not literally," Ani jokes.

"Doesn't Scriptor get most of the money?" Electronica asks.

"I pay him $50 every day and keep the rest. If I don't end up earning $50 that day, I go into debt. He says it's to encourage employees to work hard and encourage more customers to come to his store." It's not fully a lie. After my book's initial launch, I found myself with more money than I had ever expected to earn. I usually end up keeping 50 dollars per day and donating the rest to charity.

"Ever seen him?" Tutrix asks.

"Once. When he hired me. I couldn't see past his mask and his voice was distorted."

"How do you pay him?" Electronica wonders.

"I leave fifty dollars in the cash register at the end of every day."