The choice is Yours! (Interactive Story)

What now?

I don't know anything anymore. The longer I was awake the more I felt like all my emotions started to vanish and get eaten by that huge hall in my chest. It was more than just chocking me by now. I felt completly suffocated and not only but I felt as if that would surely end everything. Maybe it was better this way because it was indeed my fault to be here and that I was here was not a mircale but a mistake surely.

What should I do now....

Is there anything left to live for?

I always wanted to be a hero to support my family... to support my mom... to help her... to proof that people were wrong about me...

I....

What should i do?

Do I deserve going on?

No... I am a killer. 

I killed my mom.

I am not a hero.

I am just a fake.

I am a mistake and a curese.

Why didn't I realize that sooner. 

How foolish I was.

Maybe I could have prevented that from happening....

My thoughts were literally starting to overthrow themselves. It was like a domino effect. Once I started questioning myself, I started questioning everything up until now. It was nothing good to do so but what was left for me to do if not that?

Should I maybe just end it?

There has to be a way out?

I can't stand this!

It's suffocating!

I can't breath!

But... maybe what if... NO!

No what if!

I killed her!

It was me!

Thoughts are a dangerous weapon and right now it was killing me more than anything else. I was already emotionless drowning in the pits of my guts. Nothing was there to hurt me anymore but the sheer fact that I killed my mother and was the one alive made me think more about it. Was it really just luck? Was it a coincidenc? Or was this me being a magnet for all kind of misfortune? Didn't I endure already enough in my life?

The answer to everything was just no.

I knew how hard my mother had it because of me and I was still denying it. Even a blind person could see what I was trying to tell myself all this time that it was fine, that it was not fine. I shouldn't have been that ignorant all this time. Not only was I soo obviously blind to the fact that I ignored her pain. Was I actully really worth it?

Was it worht it to ignore her pain?

Was I not guilty of being the reason for it?

Was it not wrong for me?

I knew everything. I was not blind but I was always telling myself that I was not like they were saying. My mom used to encourage me and so on. I thought I was right in what I was doing. I thought I would make it. But this... this just showed me how wrong I was.

I was useless in the palm of fate and the world. Maybe this was something that was already programmed and there was no escaping it but then why was I feeling this bad?

Why did I feel as if this was all my fault?

WHY?!

It felt like the ground beneath my feet was dragged away. My anchor and my support was gone. Now what was I without anything left? Who was I to be standing here saying I was a Midoriya? WHO IN THE DAMN WORLD WAS I SUPPOSED TO BE NOW?! I was a criminal, a killer and had blood on my hands! I was not supposed to be here. I was a troublemaker and a useless noisence. 

It should have been me...

It should have been me who died that day.

Why did they safe me and not my mother?

WHY?!

Once again I was staring solely on the ceiling not knowing what to do. Each time I closed my eyes, I could see the incident and then the fire which started and... I could see my moms face. Her pale face as her eyes were closed in peace. It was hauting me....it was there... and then I was hearing her voice... telling me why it had to come like that? Why her? Why did that happen....

I don't know...

I don't know...

Oh I just don't know...

I wish it was me too....

If tears would start to flow down my cheek then that would be great but there was nothing. I couldn't cry. I was not allowed to cry as it was my own fault for doing it....my fault... my own hands killed her... who was I to cry about it... who was I to feel sad now... just who was I to think I would have some mercy .....

The longer I was staring at the ceiling the more I got the urge to just do something. 

Choices!

A) Escape the room

B) Stick with being in the room