Becoming Lara (Thomas Sangster Fanfic)

A deep sleep

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"What do I do when there's too much of me,
To little of you.
What can I say when I know your not here to stay"
-Alina Baraz
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Thomas's POV:

"It's really left up to if she wakes up or not. That's the point we're at right now. And I-I'm really sorry. Now I have three documents here, I need you to sign for the procedure to go forth, obviously if you dont sign these we can't see exactly what happened, we can only guess. So this operation will help us determine what damage the fall has caused. Sometimes these little falls can cause big damage, or vice versa. So here's the documents-"

The nurse dumps a pile of papers into my stiff hands.

"-we need those signed by tomorrow when the procedure will accrue. If you have any other questions you need answering, please don't hesitate to ask. And I personally suggest taking the kids home and getting some rest. We see this a lot and it's usually fine. If she wakes up we will notify straight away. Don't stress"

The words stress linger in my head.

She looks us all up and down. Everyone who was at the house came.

"Also visiting hours are over in exactly-"

She looks at the clock on the wall.

"23 minutes. I'm sorry but it's necessary you leave within that time frame."

With that she lifts her feet and walks off. Dylan, hand on my shoulder, turns to me,

"Did you listen to what she was saying?"

"No." I say. My lips burn with the words. I feel so numb yet I can feel so many emotions. I feel so terrible. The kids. I have to take them home. I look down at my children. My beautiful children. Layla is trying to not look sad. Being the older one. She's only 7. And cameron, he couldn't hold it in. Tears stain his clothes and cheeks. It was his 6th birthday a month ago. Oh god. What if she doesn't wake up, what if-

"Okay we all need to go, if Lara was awake right now she would make everyone leave and go sleep. And look at these Angels. They need to sleep!" Ava hugs Cameron and Layla. She has always been so positive when it came to others.

I've been staring at the same wall for nearly three hours. I can't move. Ava looks at me.

"Tommy?" She hugs me.

"I'll take the kids in my car. We'll all leave. I'm sure you could stay for longer but please come back with us. The kids need you now." She looks at me. I waver my eyes from the wall and they fall unto hers. Tears immediately start developing in my eyes.

"Ok" I nod.

- - - - - - -

I'm lying in our bed, the windows open letting in a cool breeze. I heard some yelling before but it's probably just Ava yelling at Derek for something stupid. I focus on the breeze. One side of the bed is as empty as my chest. The other side is full of my emotions. That's all I am right now. A walking sack of feelings. But the most overwhelming, is numbness. I feel everything but nothing at all. It does not even make much sense to me.

There is this cricket. Just sitting on the windowsill, and every time a breeze comes in it spreads its wings and does a funny little dance. I've been watching it for an hour now. It looks so peaceful. Like finally it's found comfort in itself. It's so adorable.

I hear someone walking up the stairs. The door opens and in comes Ava. My beloved sister. She sits at the end of the bed. But gets up again because she left the door open and she has OCD. She sits back down again. She's wearing a pale pink night-gown and White slippers. She shivers and walks over to the window, she pulls down on the handles-