What's left (残り物)

31. Part of yourself

"So, how are you holding up about the whole, y'know, clone ordeal?" Gray asks.

"I'm fine. I think I'll be better later. It's been a crazy day hasn't it, but I'll admit..."

I bounce on the cot's mattress. The bedding is nice and soft

"...this living seems pretty comfy."

We both smile at each other. A warm joy clings to me. 

"I'll go see what that scientist is doing. They seem pretty friendly."

I did want to ask some more things after all. I was too curious to not have my questions answered. Plus an entire underground facility self sustaining itself does not come easy at all. I walk into the vat room and I spot the scientist there writing down some notes in front of the soft glow of the vats. Dark hair dangling down over the paper as their white paw-hand scribbles away. I walk closer wondering what's written down. I peep over their shoulder. Suddenly, they stop writing and let out an amused giggle.

"22, It's good to see you. What brings you here so late at night? Is your bed uncomfy?"

They smile. I smile. I take a seat next to them as they continue writing. I have some questions to ask them, but perhaps I'll delve into them a bit. They seem very interesting.

"So watcha doing?"

"I'm doing a little math for the rocket. I want to make sure we can get past the stratosphere without blowing up after all."

A very grim bit of humor, but I like it. They stop for a second and I catch the glimpse of an eye through the black hair. An eye evoking a sense of hidden knowledge. They smile and giggle once more as they continue chatting with me.

"I see you've dyed your hair while you've been out there, 22. You've been out there 4, 5 years now? That would make"

My hair was that nice bright blue that had faded to a much darker color. I dyed it when I got to that iron city. They had some makeup and accessories from the older times. I feel a bit flustered that they would take notice of it. 

"I know why it's blue. Cyan is one of my favorite colors. Seems even out in the remnants you still stay true to your roots. Although, It looks like you also took a liking to eyeshadow as well~" another giggle let out by the snow-furred hybrid. I suppose I should contribute to the conversation or it would be completely one sided.

"I...um wanted to know more about you."

"Oh? Well if that's so then I would love to tell you anything you want."

They rest their wolfish snout on a bridge of fingers made by their hands.

"Anything in particular you wanted to know?"

"Um... I'm not sure. I just wanted to know more."

"Alright. Well, as you know I was a scientist for TULIP. I was part of a team of around 20 I think. We did research and development on hybrids and cybernetics. Some of it consisted of military application. Some of it was just for quality of life improvements. I worked on these projects for many years. I made a lot of progress with my team. I modified myself to a more satisfactory form, and that form is the one you see in front of you. I'll admit it could use some improvements. I do want a few changes. I want a lot of changes actually." They let out a light sigh. "Hopefully in the future things will change. We're all hoping so." They look away towards the vats. "I have hope it will. How about you, 22? Why don't you tell me a bit more about yourself?"

They say that like they can't see through my eyes. Maybe they haven't seen it all however.

"I uh survived for all those years. It wasn't pretty. It was painful and it was hard. I was scared at first. I was curious. I woke up in the middle of a field. I didn't know who I was or what was going on. I looked down and saw the nametag Boris. I wandered in that field. It had crisp dry grass. It felt nice. It calmed me down and I began to wander more. I wandered because I was lost and searching. The crisp color blended in the evening colors with the yellowing horizon, and a soft breeze flowed through the blades of grass. They waved in the wind. It was beautiful."

We stared at one another in silence

"I always loved the feeling of isolation. I wanted to experience silence. I wanted to watch as the stillness of the surroundings is for me to observe. I wanted to live in that void of a moment. I felt the beauty of nothingness. The feeling of blankness, devoid from the eyes of others." 

That silence fills the air. An all too familiar sound. We take it in before they reluctantly break it.

"What do you plan on doing when this is over?"

"I didn't think that far. I didn't think it would be over any time soon. I expected to do the same supply runs for that city with its iron walls every day. Until, I guess I eventually died from some awful cause. Probably zombies. Maybe suicide. I um... I want to see space. I was really excited when I saw what you all were building. I just had so much hope. I want to leave this place so bad. I would look up to those space merchants in the sky and wish I had some ship to leave. I think everyone did. Sometimes they sent people gifts. They never got anywhere close to us, but they would occasionally land somewhere distant. I think I want my own ship. I want to see space."

They silently laugh light-heartedly. "I like that. I'm glad we have similar minds. I really see myself in you. I...like that a lot. Um..." 

The both of us may be thinking the same thing. Maybe not, but I want to go with the flow with this. I slowly bring my face to theirs and they copy. Our snouts come together in some slow little kiss. It's nice. They smile.

"We'll get to space, 22." They rub my inner thigh.

"Soon."     Soon