Silently In Tune (COMPLETE)

Twenty-Eight: Question

Valerian Calix

We all went out to eat after the concert.

I was uncomfortable. As I usually was.

Vina held my hand in her lap, her other hand stopping my knee from bouncing when I realized I was doing it.

We ate, she was fully immersed in conversation with everyone and I observed the conversation.

Jessie would always subconsciously tap her arm whenever she got excited about something.

But I noticed Jessie being mindful of her habits, it only occurring a few times.

I still wanted to... I'm not that gory. I'm fine.

I don't hurt people. I'm fine.

She squeezed my hand and I looked.

She drug her finger on my inner ring one.

"When did this happen?"

"A year ago."

"Why?"

"I decided I'm moving here for you." I said.

"What if this didn't work out how you wanted?"

"Then all my twisted thoughts would've been reality and you would've been a missing woman." I snapped and she froze, shocked by my tone more than my words.

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

She asked for the bill for us and made an excuse for us to leave.

She said goodbye to everyone, giving side hugs.

I nodded my goodbyes as we left.

I got her in my car and she gaped at me when I got in.

"What's wrong? Did I do something?"

"No. You didn't." I said.

"Are you sure?" She was genuinely concerned.

"I'm just... on edge. I'm feeling hyper aggressive. I'm sorry I didn't mean to speak to you like that. It wasn't my right." I meant every word.

"You're alright. If you need to talk about it or anything I'm here for you, love." She told me.

I felt my throat close again.

"Val." She said, noticing something.

She held my face, turning my car on and my AC on high.

"Stay with me, you're alright. You're here with me." She nodded and I swallowed, my throat closed so the lump I felt wasn't leaving.

She got out of the car and came in my side, moving my seat back before she straddled me, shutting the door, wrapping her arms around my neck, pressing her throat to my nose herself.

I was fine.

"Is it a thought you had? What's wrong? What made you feel this way?"

"I-" I inhaled, the smell of her perfume and sweat on my nose, soothing me enough for me to work through my words.

"I don't mean it. I just don't want to hurt you by it, I didn't have a good thought about Jessie. She was minding me and being good-"

She kissed me, her lips on mine, her tongue moving over my bottom lip.

The kiss was deep, satisfying.

She worked her mouth on mine, our rhythm perfect together.

She pulled back, wiping my lip.

"Breathe, you're allowed to have your own thoughts. I can't control what you already punish yourself for." She gave me a soft smile.

"I wanted to grab her arm and cut off her hand." I felt my teeth grounding together, anger resurfacing more than what previously happened.

"That's... vulgar. But alright. You know you're not going to, I know you feel bad for it, you're fine. Why do you think you're so aggressive today?" She asked.

"I need you. And even this close isn't close enough. I can't accept that you can't be a permanent part of me as ridiculous as that sounds."

"Okay." She nodded.

"Do you think there are any solutions to fix that?" She followed with.

Yes. Give me the whole night to fuck you raw.

"I'm unsure."

"If there's anything I can do, please tell me." She whispered.

"Okay."

"I have a question." I said.

"Hm?"

"With the guys you have been with, did you use condoms?" I asked.

"The last two, yes, my first time I did but after that since he was my boyfriend I didn't."

I debated how I felt about that.

"I'm highschool right?"

"Mmhm."

"Have you ever had a scare because he... came inside you?" I had to know.

My sanity demanded it.

"...one."

"Valerian." She grabbed my jaw.

"Hm."

"It was once, six years ago. The only time ever and it was an accident I didn't want to happen. You have me now. More than one time. And however you want me." She said.

That made me feel halfway better, the other half just wanted to claim her completely.

"Come home with me? I have clothes for you there." I said.

"Okay."