Trap Queen

Ch. 21

G // Beyoncé

'G, please call me back. I won't give up until you give me da chance tuh talk tuh you. I know you 'ate me right now...' Wrong. I don't hate her. I fucking love her, and I hate that I love her... 'I miss you. I know I fucked up, and I also know I dun deserve a minute of yuh time, but I'm 'oping you'll give it tuh me anyways. Just...*she sighs heavily* just please call me back. I love you.'

That was the thirteenth voicemail she's left me in the past two days since her graduation. Apparently Onika brought her here to wait for me, but I didn't come home that night. I met up with one of my old fucks, and I regretted it instantly. Kaylee had been one of my pussy calls for three years, but once I got with Robyn I cut all ties with her and anyone else in my little black book.

Chris is the only other person I've fucked since Robyn left me and every time we fucked, it felt wrong. Nothing feels right without her. She meant... fuck... means everything to me. Maybe I should call her and meet up with her.

My fingers hovers over her name for at least five minutes before I hit the number to dial. Before the first ring completed, I quickly hit the end button.

"Just do it." I look up and see Nicki standing in my doorway.

"I can't." I shake my head and sigh.

"Why? Because you're stubborn? Do you even realize how much of your shit she put up with after you two met? She fucks up one time, and you're done?"

"Nicki..."

"Nah, don't 'Nicki' me. Fucking call her. That girl is so head over motha fuckin heels for you and would go to the end of the earth for you, and you feel the exact same way. Don't lose her." She let's out a frustrated sigh before walking back out of my room.

I fucking hate that she's always right... I just need to think of what I want to say to her once I do finally get the courage to call.

"You frustrated the fuck outta me that I forgot what I even came in here for. Here, this was in the mail." She hands me an envelope and walks back out.

I look down at the letter, holding it in my hand. There isn't anything on the letter but my name and address. It isn't a bill, its an actual letter. Who still writes nowadays?

I open it and feel my heart stop for a second. It's from tio...

My dearest Beyoncé,
If you're reading this, I've left you. Please don't be sad, we both knew this day was coming. I've trained you your whole life to take over on the cartel, and I know you're ready. I am so proud of you, my baby girl. You've grown into such an amazing, beautiful young woman. Your mama and papa would be proud. There is one thing I need you to do for me...don't push people away once I'm gone. Especially Rihanna. That girl loves you, and you love her. Don't lose that. The life we live is a gamble. We could lose our life or the life of a loved one at any second, and you don't want to take those people or moments for granted. Take my word for it, baby. You'll need her once you take over this army. You're a leader now, Giselle. You're no longer a child, you can no longer think like a child, and you need to think of the consequences of your actions. I know who the snake is in our army, but you need to figure this out yourself. Make Onika your right hand, Giselle. You're going to need her. I'll be looking down at you smiling with pride. Te amo, mija.

-Tio Raul

I bring my knees to my chest and let the tears roll freely down my face.

"Bey..." I look up and Nicki gives me a half smile. "It was from tio, huh?" I nod my head, and she walks over to the bed I'm sitting on. "I thought that was his handwriting. Are you okay, babe?" I shake my head no. "Wanna talk?" Again, I shake my head no. "Want...Rihanna?" I answer 'yes' in my head but continue to remain quiet. She kisses my forehead and gets off of the bed, closing my door behind her.