(Roy was hanging out by a street alley while wearing an oversized trenchcoat, trying to sell crack for money. Suddenly, a crackhead wearing a top hat approached.)
Top Hat Crackhead: Excuse me, sir, are you selling crack?
Roy: Uh, whatcha think I'm doing? *pulls baggie from his pocket* Here-
Top Hat Crackhead: Oh, lovely, lovely!~ *hands out baggie* I'll take 2, please!~
Roy: *happily gives them the crack, counting his newly gained money*
Top Hat Crackhead: Thank you~ Have a wonderful day~
(As the top hatter man left, another man with extremely tattered clothing and a beanie came up to Roy. Meanwhile, Manny was turning the corner carrying a red wagon filled withwhen he saw Roy.
Beanie Crackhead: Excuse me, man, I'm lookin' fo some crack-
Roy: Yeah, got your crack right Here-
Manny: What The Fuck!?! DAD!?! *runs up to them* Oh my FUCKING GOD!!
Roy: *tries hiding his face* Uh, I don't know what you're talking about-
Manny: Ohhhhh YES YOU DO!!! Where have you been!? I've been calling you for hours!!
Roy: I'm not your dad, I'm an ordinary crack dealer!!
Beanie Crackhead: I don't know what neither of y'all talkin' about- Can you please just give me- the crack-, I need 3 of em-
Manny: I wanna say I'm shocked seeing you like this, but I'm honestly not!!
Roy: I told you, I don't know what you're talking about!!
Beanie Crackhead: Can y'all hold this off for a minute- The- Crack-
Manny: Meanwhile, I'm the one who's gotta get groceries from the money I took from your wallet so I don't STARVE!!!
Beanie Crackhead: Having your kid buy groceries is fucked up, man. He co-could get kidnapped or suming- Terrible-
Roy: Look, I'm NOT your dad, now get THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!! *pushes them both away* Yo, I'm serious!!
(Suddenly, the man in the top hat came back.)
Top Hat Crackhead: Uh, excuse me, sir, I would like to return this crack.
Roy: Wut????
Beanie Crackhead: I haven't even got mine yet, and you bringin' shit back-
Top Hat Crackhead: I said I would like to return this crack!!
Roy: This ain't Walmart, [REDACTED]!! AIN'T NO RETURN POLICIES, no motherfuckin' EXCHANGES!!-
Top Hat Crackhead: No, no, no, it is defective! Look- *points inside the baggie* It's all burnt up! Look, singed around the edges!!
Roy: Man, ain't nothing wrong with this crack! This is good CRACK!!
Beanie Crackhead: Ain't shit happenin' whit my crack- You not good at this cause my crack dealer's a LOT faster-
Manny: Are you gonna be here for a while? Cause- *sees Harry and Robin's car pull up* OHOHO, this is gonna be DELICIOUS!! *runs over to them*
Roy: NONONO- Don't get em-
Top Hat Crackhead: Now, there's no reason to be rude!! I paid good money for this, and it is all BURNT UP! LOOK!!
Manny: *comes running back with Harry and Robin right behind him* SEE?! I TOLD YOU HE WAS HERE!!
Roy: *looks down angrily*
Top Hat Crackhead: See?? Look!! Sir? Sir? Sir? You're not even looking!!-
Harry: Oh my god- Roy, is that you!? Aren't you supposed to be getting the money for the show?
Manny: Oh, he is! Care to explain, Daddy?
Roy: Noooo! Don't you- Ngh- DON'T YOU SEE I'M SELLING CRACK!!
Manny: Oh, we certainly do.
Robin: Roy, I know GOD DAMN WELL YOU NOT OUT HERE SELLING THAT SHIT!!!
Manny: He is.
Harry: Roy, you're a drug dealer!? I trusted you to get the money LEGALLY!!
Manny: That was your first mistake.
Beanie Crackhead: *puts a hand on Roy's shoulder* Could I just get mine and go? I was supposed to pick my daughter up from school 8 hours ago.
Harry: Wait what-
Robin: Roy, you are NOT staying here! NOW GET IN HE FUCKING CAR!!
Top Hat Crackhead: Now if you don't give me some new crack, OR A REFUND, I SIR, will take my business elsewhere!!
(Roy finally had enough and pushed them all away.)
Roy: WILL YOU MOTHERFUCKERS GET AWAY FROM ME!!? *runs off* UUGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!
Manny: *angrily stomps after Roy* Guess we gotta do this the hard way then-
Harry: *turns to the other two crackheads* Sirs, I am so sorry for the trouble. That was my business partner and he-
Robin: HARRY, GET IN THE CAR NOW!!
(FIN.)
(Sorry for being inactive btw. Writer's block-)
