burning for you - rengoku k.

seventeen.

What we didn't realize, is that we both suffered injuries. It was hard to decide what bloodstain was ours and what belonged to others, I didn't feel pain at all. I was numb.

I had many-many scratches on my sides but Kyojuro had a bigger injury on his right arm and side, when he sheltered me with his body when the accident happened. I just didn't notice and he didn't say a word about it.

He was walking with me on his back, in the rain, in complete silence.

He took me back to the Butterfly mansion. I had a high fever, making me hazy so I fell asleep while the butterfly girls were still treating my injuries.

Nightmares were haunting me, but they were different from the usual ones, those that were haunting me from my childhood. These nightmares had no concrete form. Just feelings. I had no words for them, as I didn't see pictures. Just colors, blurry images; but they had an unsettling sound, ringing loudly in my head. Screams. Scratching claws. Splash of fluid. Rhythmic ringing. Breaking glass. They all merged into a dark melody accompanying the blurry images, making me frightened and anxious.

I sat up in bed in the middle of the night, cold sweat covering my whole body, my throat painfully dry. I noticed a glass of water next to my bed, I grabbed it and drank it so fast, that streams of water rolled down from the corner of my mouth, down my neck, wetting the white pajamas I was wearing.

"Kagemi, are you okay?" I turned my head to the direction where I heard Kyojuro's tired voice from. The room was dark, but the moon provided enough light for me to recognize his silhouette on the bed on my left.

"Just a bad dream" I answered. "What happened after...?" I couldn't finish my question. "Where are we?"

"We are at the Butterfly mansion. We were both injured but nothing serious" he said.

I suddenly started feeling cold, remembering the demon we couldn't defeat. I felt unpleasant goosebumps appearing on my skin.

I got out of my bed, feeling faint stings of pain on my body, but I experienced worse before. Without thinking, I walked to Kyojuro's bed, and lay down next to him, cuddling up under the sheets. He hissed a bit when I accidentally touched his injuries.

"Oh, sorry" I whispered.

"It's okay" he answered, wrapping his uninjured arm around me as I rested my head on his chest. He was warm. Comfortably warm. He didn't seem bothered by me laying next to him.

"Why didn't you tell me you were so injured?" I asked.

"I didn't notice it" he said lowly, gently petting my head. His warmth started to make me feel a bit sleepy, he was really comfortable.

He sighed. "You are so different right now"

"Am I?" I looked up at him, his beautiful flaming eyes were inspecting me.

"Yes" he smiled softly. "I have never seen you this vulnerable before"

I put my head back on his chest. "I will be okay, don't worry" I murmured into his skin.

His tone turned from soft to serious. "It wasn't our fault, Kagemi" he stated. "Don't blame yourself, don't punish yourself. We learned from it. We can't abandon our duty"

"I know. I will not abandon my duty. I just..." I bit my lips, letting out a big sigh. "Let's just forget about it for now, okay?"

"Okay" he whispered, running his fingers through my hair.

His soft breathing and his warmth made me sleepy again, soon after I lost my train of thoughts as I fell into a deep, dreamless slumber.

I woke up the the sun suddenly blinding me, as someone opened the dark curtains.

I opened my eyes, my gaze fell on a smiling Shinobu. She didn't say a word, she just left the room. I tried to sit up, but Kyojuro's arm was wrapped tightly around me. He was still asleep, it seemed like the sunlight wasn't bothering him.

My stomach started to rumble, I didn't remember when was the last time I ate. I tried to move out of Kyojuro's embrace, without waking him up, but I failed. He slowly opened his eyes.

"Good morning" he smiled softly.

"Mornin" I smiled back. "I thought about getting some food"

"Good idea" he nodded and tried sitting up, but suddenly he was hissing in pain. I put my palms on his chest to make him lay back.

"Easy, okay? I will ask someone to get food for you" I said and he nodded.

"Thank you, Kagemi"

I put on the slippers someone left next to my bed, then I left the room.

As I left, I almost crashed into Shinobu, who had some towels in her hands.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Kocho-san" I bowed.

She waved her hands. "I think I told you before Kagemi, call me Shinobu" she smiled. "Are you hungry? Breakfast almost ready" she said.

I nodded. "One of my disciples will take the food for Rengoku-san" she said as I followed her towards the dining area. "You can eat with us, right now you two are our only patients."

I nodded and joined the butterfly girls. Shinobu sat closer to me, keeping her voice low. "I see he opened up to you after all"

I almost choked on my rice, I felt blood rushing to my face.

I just remembered his kiss. I completely forgot about it. I didn't even know what it meant. I had a panic attack - maybe it was the only way he could make me snap out of it. And yes, I slept next to him - but I had no second thoughts or romantic intentions. I just needed comfort from him.

I couldn't deny the fact that I had strong feelings for him. He made me feel safe. He made me feel like I belong somewhere. I wanted to be near him all the time. I remembered my talk with Mitsuri, she said I was surely in love.

But I had no time to think about it. I was still strongly under the effects of our failed mission. I had no energy and brain to untangle my feelings for Kyojuro. And I wasn't even sure what were his feelings towards me, maybe he was just nice to me. Because he cared about me as my friend.

I sighed, putting down my food, smiling at Shinobu. "I can't really think about this right now"

She smiled at me with sympathy, gently squeezing my arm. "I understand"

We continued eating in silence, I felt like I already started regaining my strength and my will to continue fighting.

One of the butterfly girls, whose name I forgot, looked at my empty bowl.

"Seems like you are well enough to start the recovery training" she said with a serious tone.

I scratched the back of my neck with a forced smile, knowing what it meant. The girls knew no mercy. But I was looking forward to it. I needed it. I needed to get myself together again.