His Heart Ruler (Available On Goodnovel)

chapter 25

" Have you told Asher about your feelings? "

Jenny was the one who broke the peaceful silence and shooted her question to Maya while licking every last drop of whipped cream pie.

After that day in rustorent neither Jenny or Maya talked about Asher again, since both of them got carried away  with their work life and didnt get a chance to sit around and talk about progressing things. 

Jenny knows Maya is in love but she is also in denial. The way Maya talked about Asher that day it was easy for Jenny to sense the affection and love in her eyes. 

Maya signed heavily and Sam passed a questionable look to both of them.

" Did I miss something? " He glanced at both of them before asking.

Poor Sam was looking at them for an explanation since he was not told about this by  any one of these two. 

Maya uncomfortably shifted in her place, ignoring his question.

" She slept with her colleague Asher, and she likes him or maybe she loves him and, maybe there's a possibility of them being a 'thing' in the future, " Jenny said in one go following a low-key giggle.

She was excited to tell Sam about the twisted things that happened to Maya. because she knew Maya and Sam shared a kind of love-hate bond which is purely love. But its just their bickerings makes it seem funny thought apart from their bickerings they both know how deeply they matter to each other. 

" I don't like him, " Maya retorted annoyingly.

" Yes you do, you're in denial " Jenny sticks out her tongue playfully.

" Aghhh, fuck you " Now Maya was officially annoyed.

Sam was still confused about what was happening, just a few days of absence, and a lot of things happened behind his back already. But thanks to Jenny who explained every single detail that he missed. 

" It's very simple,"

Sam's voice made Maya and Jenny look at him.

" Just ask yourself, like do I want this person in my life ? " he said

" And then what? " Jenny questioned

" See, mostly the answers to our questions are within us only..... It's just we who make everything complicated and end up searching for the answer outside while the answer is within us......take a glance at yourself, think about what makes you question your feelings for them, and why are you looking for an answer... Maybe then you'll be able to think straight and your answer will be in front of you. "

He finished saying and took a bite of crispy crunchy chips and waited for their reaction and response.

He knows his idea might sound like a philosophy class to them, but he doesn't have any better idea to offer since this is how he gets exposure to his feelings. Sam has done this before, when he was in a relationship with his girlfriend and not happy in that  relationship he had no choice but to sit back and ask himself why he couldnt be happy  with his girl and the answer was his changing feelings for men around him and him not getting the excitement from the opposite gender anymore. As he thought the answer was within him, the answer was him. 

Him not being interested in women but men. Him being attracted to men more than women. And that was the time he realised why he couldnt be happy with his girlfriend because with her he couldnt be him. He couldnt be himself anymore, he had to hold back himself and stop expressing what he actually feels from his girlfriend. That was the reason why he could no longer be in that relationship where he had to pretend like someone else.

" Not that crap, seriously... You both are so cringy kids " Maya wasn't impressed with Sam's one-question-to-self idea, she felt that this is too lame and stupid.

But Jenny was silent, she didn't say anything because knowingly or unknowingly Sam gave her some sort of clarity that she wanted the most in this situation.

" Well, then figure it out by yourself, " snapped Sam.

" Thank you, It was better without your stupid idea, anyway " she replied pushing her hair back with a taunting smirk.

For a moment, Maya wanted to try what Sam suggested but the next minute she felt stupid and dropped the idea of trying such things which could possbile result in regret of trying. She wasnt ready to face her own feelings now, because if she did then she would have to accept what she is denying from all this while. 

" I was just trying to help you out ...but you know what? you don't deserve my ideas at all....rot in hell," he grumbled over her, with a firm face

" Same to you " Maya mimicked him which irritates him like anything.

But Jenny was silent, she didn't say anything because knowingly or unknowingly Sam gave her some sort of clarity that she wanted the most in this situation.

As Sam and Maya were continuing with their bickering Jenny was still lost in her thoughts and after a few minutes of Jenny's silence, Maya and Sam stopped their bickering and looked at Jenny.

" Penny for your thoughts," said Sam, jerking Jenny's shoulder a little to bring her back to reality from her land.

" What's wrong? Maya nudged her shoulder lightly.

Jenny looked at both of them with a black face and murmured " I think........ I like Ryan " she breathed out leaving them baffled.