Alpha Logan

THIRTY FOUR: mate

I glanced around the room I was in. Madison's living room.

Yet now, the television was turned off and Madison lay next to me, sound asleep. I controlled my deep breathing and wiped a beam of sweat off my forehead. I searched hazily for a clock. 2 am.

Fuck. I have to go check on Clementine.

I peeled the blanket off me and gathered my shoes off the floor. They remained cold and damp from standing out in the rain for so long, yet I still slipped them on.

I slowly got up and walked over to Madison's front door and exited her apartment. I made my way to my apartment down the hall and shakily held the keys in my hands. I pushed the door open and immediately greeted my meowing cat at the door.

Once I closed my door, I felt goosebumps trickle slowly down my back. I noticed the lamp in the living room was on and I realized something more sinister sat in my apartment.

He was here.

I could feel his presence burning deeply into my skin, and it was something I used to crave so desperately. Now, I wished it would never return.

I almost immediately regretted giving him a key to my apartment, yet something in the back of my head told me he would've found a way in any way.

I slowly turned my back to the couch and saw him sitting quietly on the sofa. Logan sat with his hands intertwined with each other and carefully looked up at me. I watched his eyes slowly take in my appearance. I wondered how long he sat here, in my house, uninvited.

I gulped down the bile that was inching up in my throat.

"Bella-" Logan began, but almost immediately I stopped him.

I needed to know all the answers to see the full, clear picture of what the fuck was going on in this man's head.

"What's a mate?" I bit out, and my voice sounded so spiteful I even surprised myself.

Logan blinked a few times at me, distinctly taken aback by my question. "It's a werewolf's other half- someone who was destined to be with them. Their soulmate."

The words he spoke burned harshly in my ears. "How?"

"The Gods in my world create these mates compatibly. It's the only person a werewolf should ever be with." Logan's deep voice grumbled out.

I felt a trickle of sweat slowly fall down my back. "And if it's not meant to be?"

"It's always meant to be."

The words pierced through my lungs and made their way into my heart, encapsulating every word that rolled off his tongue.

"I don't think-" I started to harshly reprimand him before Logan interrupted me.

"A mate is our whole world. Every fiber of our being revolves around our mates. From the moment a werewolf wakes up to the second he dies, a mate is the only thing he'll ever truly have. The things I've seen werewolves do for their mates are excruciating and lengthy, it's always meant to be. The Moon God doesn't make mistakes when it comes to mates." Logan stood from the couch and made his way toward me. He stood so close I could smell his cologne igniting my nose.

"So, whose yours then?" I blankly looked at him.

Logan reached his hand up to his chin and slowly brushed against his jaw in thought. He knew I was testing him, and I wondered how far he would go. "You," Logan spoke softly.

The mere word brought tears up to my eyes. "How long were you going to string me along before I found out?"

The silence in the room surrounded us and ate at the strings of my heart. "I was trying to protect you. I didn't mean for it to get this far," Logan pierced his lips together.

"How long?" I asked again.

"I wasn't going to, because the thought of you getting hurt ate at me for months." Logan's fingers tips brushed against my arms lightly. It was something I used to find something so comforting, but now I couldn't help but feel anxiety creeping on me as he began to touch me.

I bite harshly on the inside of my cheeks and the metallic taste of blood swished around in my mouth. "So, this was the better option?" I paused as I caught my thoughts. "You would just whisk me on with you, only a fraction of your life. I'd be kept in the dark for however long it was convenient for you until either I found out or I died a blind girl who never even knew who you were. I would've never known what you are."

"I know how it looks, but the shit I've seen and done would make you hate me. I couldn't let you get hurt, especially on my account."

"Well, now look at me." My voice shook as the tears fell swiftly down my face. "I thought I loved you– how fucking stupid was I? I barely even know you."

"I am still me, Bella." Logan's voice quietly spoke in such regret.

"Hardly." I spit back at him. "I want you to leave now, and give me my house key."

"Bella, I love you. You're all I fucking think about, every single second of the day, I need to make this better. Please," Logan's eyes pleaded with me.

"Get out, please." I stepped back away from him. I grasped onto my chest again in an attempt to calm myself down.

"I'm so sorry, Bella," Logan told me before he placed my key in the palm of my hand. I watched him open the front door and walk out of my apartment.

I gaped brutally at the key that burned my skin, he was gone.

________

 Let me know your thoughts! How do you feel about Logan now that the truth is out?